The Unattainable Boss!
by Shyloe
Summary: A story of Bella working her way up, and trying not to make a fool out of herself in front of her boss, who she cant stop thinking about, can she get through to him and his brick walls, or will he remain Unattainable forever.
1. Ch1 Doubt Me Not!

**Stephenie Meyer owns All of these Characters, even the sexy James! Boo hoo boo hoo!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 1: Doubt Me Not!

I can see it, he may be fully covered but underneath those clothes... he is completely one hundred percent... naked...

Okay ya ya everyone is naked under there clothes... but no one looks as great naked as he does, well at least in my mind anyway,see I haven't actually seen my boss naked * cue blush * but I have thought about it so much, that I feel like I have... his long shoulder length hair in a low pony tail, his bright blue eyes almost electric, his square jaw, that little bit of stubble that drives me crazy, his body is fit, and strong, without being overly big, he is the perfect man for me, and so totally unattainable... I guess maybe I should start with my name...

Hi I'm Isabella Swan, but my friends call me Bella... actually everyone calls me Bella.. except for my swoon worthy Boss, James Masters... or Mr. Masters... only people that call him James in this office, are the ones who get fired 3 seconds afterward... because not only is my boss the most attractive man on this whole earth, he is also cruel, and judgmental too. I hear a lot of crap from him, how inadequate I am for this job... which is seriously a crock... I'm an over qualified secretary, and the only reason I haven't told him to shove it is because... well come on if you don't already know read above! and the money isn't bad too! anyway, so here I am typing out Mr. Masters daily schedule.

It is already set up on the computer, which he can transfer over to his blackberry, that he never removes from his hip... but he really loves to make things difficult, and he seems to think the three dozen columns I have to read through, and categorize, before it goes to him, is just not enough... "beautiful bastard" I grumble under my breath, as I see him screaming on the phone through the window to his office. Did I mention the man likes to yell.. a lot.

I quickly print two copies one for myself, and ones for Mr. Masters, then very quietly, and steadily walk into the lions den. His door was open, so I knew it was safe to enter... at least that's what I figured till I planted his schedule on his desk and look up. His eyes were locked and narrowed directly on me. I kept my face stone and started to back out... until he abruptly put his hand up, in a -stop now or I will eat you whole and spit out your bones- move. So I stopped, since I did enjoy breathing, and my bones very much.

"This conversation is over, if you can't handle the truth, then go work somewhere else... actually I insist on it, your fired Victoria, come and pack your shit, before I have it thrown in the dumpster out back."

Uh oh this was gonna be a bad day, but inside I was thrilled. Victoria was a column writer... not a very good one... and she was also an ongoing fling with James- Mr. Masters, at least that was the story around the office, I wanted to believe it wasn't true, but the woman was gorgeous, with fiery red hair, bright green eyes, a gorgeous smile, and a body to die for... hell if I was a lesbian and not so damn shy I'd wanna do her too. James shh don't tell him I use his name... was giving me the stink eye still, and I had no idea what his beef was, I was about to ask him how I could help, but he thankfully, finally spoke up. "Isabella, I understand that you don't believe in boundaries, but when I am in the middle of a conversation the polite thing to do is to stay the FUCK out till I'm done." Oh boy this was gonna be a rough one.

"Yes Mr. Masters, I apologize." I said quietly... because even though my inner monologue is brave, and judgmental, and witty and powerful, I'm not like that on the outside... I've been referred to as a kitten way more times than I would ever like to admit... and I really hated confrontation. I could feel my cheeks heating as James stared me down. He had always told me if the door is open come on in, but if its closed stay out, buzz him if its important... but today was gonna be one of those, I'm never satisfied days... I just wanted to crawl under a rock and watch from a distance.

"Hold all my calls, and if Victoria is not here by noon today I want her shit packed up, and thrown in the garbage bin out back... do you understand?" He asks. I nod, even though I really don't want to touch her shit, it would give her another excuse to freak on me... she always waned to rail on me, like a damn high school classroom, where the teacher is late. "Good, now get out of my office and out of my face." With that, I beat feet and speed walked to my desk... where I can watch, from a distance, just the way I liked it.

….

12:02 the clock on my desk blinked, and I groaned for the fifth time in the past two minutes, Victoria had not come to collect, which means, I should be packing her shit up right now... instead I ducked my head and started to read another column, which I finished too quickly.

12:09 oh no if I didn't get my ass up and do it soon James was gonna... "Damn it Isabella, what did I tell you to do by noon if she wasn't here to grab her shit." Yelled James from his office, obviously he had been watching to see if she would show. I didn't even bother to apologize, I just got up and jerkily threw all of her stuff in a box. Which wasn't much, a couple pictures, some candy, a couple unused condoms, and lube... what in the hell was she doing during work hours. I could feel my face heating as I quickly threw them in the box like they burned me. I looked around to see if anyone was watching, but thankfully no one was, they were all keeping there heads down and mouths shut, in fear they would be next most likely.

I quickly walked to the elevator and pushed the down button, it was only the tenth floor up, so it didn't take too long to get to the bottom, and I hurried along, hoping I would not run into the red headed bitch, but as soon as the outer door closed behind me, I knew I was not that lucky. There she was exiting the vehicle and when she spotted me with her stuff, her smug look turned down right viscous. "What in the fuck, are you doing with my stuff?" She snarled, ripping it from my hands. I took several steps back, feeling a little scared for my safety.

"James- I mean Mr. Masters asked me to throw it out." I stuttered out, feeling utterly mortified that I used his first name... and of course Victoria missed nothing

She laughed at me, her eyes narrowed. "Still following James around like a lost puppy are we." She chortled as she looked me up and down. "Get over it Isabella, he will never see you as more than a nuisance that he cant fire because your too damn goody and he cant find a reason without getting sued." I clenched my teeth together, and could feel my eyes water... dammit I hated confrontation. Instead of saying anything back, which I couldn't even if I wanted to with the golf ball sized lump in my throat, I turned and quickly walked back into the office building, and slammed the button with the up arrow a dozen times before the doors finally whined open. The elevator was a little off the past month, and no one had come to look at it yet, stupid elevator stupid people... "Stupid Victoria." I screamed, kicking the wall closest to me, her name ringing back into my ears, making my head pound.

What if she was right, what if he only kept me around because he couldn't find a reason to fire me... what if I was just some kind of shitty burden, and everyone around me knew but me. The doors dinged open and I jumped, so lost in thought that I hadn't realized I was at my floor. I got out and kept my head down. Making sure to steer clear from everyone.

Then I sat down at my desk, and... I just sat there, my brain running circles around me... the words 'not good enough', flashing in my head like a neon freaking sign. I had at least ten columns left to read, but I just couldn't pick them up. I had been at this job for three years, slaving away, doing everything he asks, accepting insult after insult, never being praised, even when I knew I should, all because of what, because my boss was attractive... OK no that was not the only reason, I wanted to work my way up, I wanted to write a column, not read other peoples, or hell I could even do both, but both times I had asked, James had told me I just didn't have what it takes... and to get him more coffee.

So I would work harder, and read others, but still nothing, I had even slipped a couple of mine in there, but never got any feedback.

Was this it for me, forcing my boss to keep me on, even though he despises me, all because I am punctual, because I act like a puppy dog and fetch and stay and lay down when he tells me to.

I put my face in my hands, feeling more sick than I ever had before, I couldn't just quit, I needed the money, my little house I rent is not the cheapest, and I have insurance, and bills. But staying at a job where I'm not wanted, how can I do that.

I knew I needed to talk to him, to ask him... but asking him anything was damn near impossible especially for me. The pile of columns on my desk were still sitting there, and I still... I just couldn't touch them.

I hate that that red headed devil has made me doubt myself so much, that I can barely function. "Isabella, my office, now." Came James' voice, directly in front of me. I hadn't even realized that he had come over. I quickly jumped up an followed him in, waiting for a tongue lashing and not the good kind. "Take a seat." He said his voice rough. I did as he asked... _like a good little puppy_ my mind taunted. "Is there a reason your have been sitting at your desk for the past hour, without doing a single thing?" James asked, now sitting across from me, his large cherry wood desk separating us.

I felt like a kid in a principles office, and for the first time in a long time, I was angry, angry and confused. "Yes there is." I said boldly, raising my chin, even as I could feel my tears fighting for dominance... "I had a confrontation with Victoria in the parking lot, because you asked me to dispose of her stuff." My voice was more sure than it had ever been before when talking to him.

"Is that so, and what did Victoria say that has disrupted your life so much?" He questioned with a hmmm at the end.

I wanted to storm out, at that moment I actually wanted him to fire me, to put me out of my misery, and so that is why I let the next words fall from my mouth. "If you don't feel that I am an asset to this company, and if you feel that I am some poor puppy you cant get rid of, I would appreciate it, if you told me now." I slammed my mouth shut, and watched as James' eyes narrowed to slits. But there was no way I could take that back now... and if I was being honest, I didn't want to... that was freaking liberating.

"Well Isabella, look who's trying to find there back bone." James gave a sly smile and sat back in his chair, I was fuming mad, my anger was trying to boil over, and I had no idea whether I was going to lash out, or cry my face off... "But it is true I'm afraid, you are somewhat of a hindrance, for me as my secretary." Cry definitely cry... abort, abort, before you make a fool... "Which is why I no longer want you as my secretary." This was it, knife through my heart, twist left, twist right... lump in my throat. "From now on you are taking over Victoria's column, and hopefully you can always make your pieces as good as the ones you slip to me once in awhile." Woah back up.

"Did you just promote me?" I croaked out, my throat tight. James just nodded once, then dismissed me, like he hadn't just given me the best freaking thrill of my life. I bolted to the bathroom, and let he tears that were on backup, fall. But those tears were tears of joy dammit, I was now a column writer.

I cleared out my old desk, and people were looking at me like I was psychotic, probably because I was grinning, and they probably thought I was fired... until I moved all my stuff to the devils old desk, then I heard a clap, and two, and three.. I looked up and the whole office was staring at me, grinning, there were a couple whoops and congrats. I laughed out loud, the joy bursting from me.

Until James came out, and told everyone to get back to work... but if I wasn't mistaken, he seemed a little less edgy... or it was just cause I was so damn happy.

**Another idea to go with the others LOL **

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	2. Ch2 Workin on up Stuck!

**Stephenie Meyer Owns all the characters!**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 2:Workin on up... Stuck!

Two weeks later, and I was rockin' my new position. My writing was stellar, at least that's what I think, I haven't been told any differently. I was beyond embarrassed when I found out what I would be writing about, and James told me if I had a problem with it, I could leave, I told him it wasn't a problem and thanked him... my column is about relationships, tips on how to keep the romance flowing! It was definitely not my specialty, but thank goddess for internet, anything I am lacking, the internet makes up for... which is quite a bit since my last relationship was in high school, thirteen years ago.

I had read over every newspaper after James published it, and he hadn't changed a single word on my column, so I'm feeling goo'ood. I'm a little worried, that I might lose my touch, have nothing to talk about after awhile, but I will cross that bridge when I get to it. Mostly, shamefully, I think about James when I write it... what I would do to that hunk if I could... and if I was bold enough to do so.

Anywho, here it is 6:15 pm, and I am running back into my office, because the dumb ass that I am, I left my keys on my desk, along with my purse. I jump into the elevator, and ride the squeaky thing up. I really should call the elevator company again, to see when they are gonna come check it out.

The office is crazy quiet, only a couple overhead lights on, and just before I hit my desk, someone walks out in front of me. I may have screamed a little. "What are you doing here Isabella, the work day has ended." Came my boss's voice.

I grabbed my chest, trying to calm my slamming heart. "Holy crap you scared me." I mumbled out, James lifted an eyebrow as if to say- well I asked you something- "Oh uh, I left my purse and keys here." I said, as I walked the last five feet, and picked them up to show him.

"Well lets go Isabella, I don't want anyone up here without me." He said with anger in his tone, as he quickly walked towards the elevator. I have to practically run to catch up, and as I step inside with him, I feel like its shrinking as the doors close, locking us in. All I could think about was the article I had written the day before, about getting frisky with your loved one in the Elevator. My face felt like it would burst from all the blood rushing to it... thankfully James never even turned to look at me. And when the Elevator abruptly stopped, I figured it was because we hit ground floor, until the power shut off.

"Uh what the hell." I said as I looked up, we had only gone down two floors, well two and a half since there was a light between the 8 and 7. That and a small emergency light, were all that was lit, the rest was pitch black, and as I turned back, James was pressing buttons quickly, jamming his fingers into them. Nothing happened. He seemed to be breathing heavily, his broad shoulders curling in... "J-Mr. Masters, are you okay?" I questioned stepping forward. James shook his head and stepped back, until his back hit the wall, his hands were clenched and so was his jaw... and that is when I realized, my boss did not like small spaces. He started loosening his tie. I walked over and pressed the large emergency button, behind the small metal opening. "Hello, is anybody there." I asked into the small speaker.

"Yes Ma'am what seems to be the problem." Came a deep timbre voice.

"Uh My Boss and I seem to be stuck in the elevator, between the seventh and eighth floor." I said looking back. James hair was now out of its pony tail, and he was running his hands through it.

"Okay Ma'am, my name is Emmett, and I am going to call the elevator company, and get them here as quickly as possible, so you two just hang tight." He said in a calm voice.

"Okay, thank you Emmett." I said as I leaned against the nearest wall and slid down. James was still standing, his breaths coming out quickly, and hell I knew he would pass out if he kept that up, but I was a little scared I might tick him off if I approached him. Of course my caring nature won, so I slowly stood up, and walked over to him, and placed my hand on his chest... his rock hard chest. I quickly threw all my lust to the back of my mind, and looked him in the eyes. "Mr... James, you need to focus on me, listen to my words." I said in a smooth commanding voice. His eyes narrowed slightly but I didn't stop. "You are going to pass out if you don't calm your breathing down." I told him, as I grabbed his hand and put it over my own chest bone, trying not to feel stupid. "Breath with me." I told him, taking slow deep breaths. At first I didn't think he would listen, but then miraculously he did. He clenched his eyes shut, and started to mimic my own breathing. It took a good five minutes to get him calmed down.

My heart was beating wildly, with the close proximity, but I made sure to keep it professional. "Okay, good job, I said when he finally oped his eyes. His electric blues staring into my boring brown. I removed his hand from my chest, and my hand from his. "Now lets sit down, and wait for Emmett to get back to us." I told him as I took a step back. James' eyes narrowed once more, and he crossed his arms, puffing out his chest. I knew he was probably just embarrassed, but hell he could at least say, hey thanks for saving my ass from passing the fuck out... obviously, that was not gonna happen. I shrugged my shoulders as he continued to stand, and sat down myself. Pulling my cell phone from my wallet, I quickly dialed my best friend Jasper's number, we were going to have a dinner at my place tonight for his girlfriends birthday.

"Well hello Darlin' why aren't you home yet?" He questioned as he picked up.

"I'm stuck in an elevator, waiting on some people to get back to us, so yeah you can start dinner without me, tell Alice I said happy birthday, and I love her okay."

"Shit your in an Elevator, are you okay, are you alone, do you need me to come down there." I laughed at his worried tone, Jasper was kinda like James in the whole small spaces makes him wanna pass out.

"No uh, my boss is in here too, and I will be fine, I have my truck here, and if I'm still in here in a couple hours I will text or call to update you okay."

Jasper let out a loud laugh, and my face heated. He knew only too well that I had a thing for James, we used to be roommates...thin walls and talking in my sleep. I quickly pressed my cell phone tightly to my ear, to keep his voice from traveling. "Oh you poor woman, I bet that is sooo hard." He laughed again, and told Alice what was happening. There was a shuffle and a beat of silence, then Alice was on the phone.

"Now is your chance sweety." She spoke quietly, thankfully. "Take your shoes off like now, then your suit Jacket off after half an hour, then your stockings, trust me it gets hot in there, use that as an excuse, take your hair out after that." I groaned and hung up, in the middle of her seducing rant. My face glowing with embarrassment.

"Hello Ma'am can you hear me." Came Emmett's voice. I quickly stood up, and walked over to the speaker.

"Hello, yes I'm here... and its Bella... Bella Swan, and also James Masters." There was a silence for several beats.

"Hello Bella and James, well I have some new, but you aren't going to be thrilled, there are three other elevators acting up over the city, and only one company open, so there is going to be a uh... well about a five or six hour wait. I am truly sorry, but I will continue to check on you every hour... James how are you doing bro." I looked up surprised, I didn't know they knew each other.

James ran his hand through his hair and stepped forward toward the speaker. "Emmett man." He croaked out. "You gotta get me outta here, I cant breath." He was talking low, and obviously embarrassed.

"Bella, take care of my brother, he does not do well in small spaces." Emmett said after a minute. "James, sit your ass down, and deep breaths." Unlike when I told him to sit, he actually listened to Emmett. "I will check on you guys every once in awhile okay."

"Okay, thank you" I said as I took my killer heels off, and placed them beside me, I was so not looking forward to spending half the night in this place. "You gonna be okay..." I asked James, who was staring directly ahead.

"I will be fine." He snarled, without looking at me. "I'm not some feeble child you have to coddle." He said his words like a cracking whip. So instead of answering, I pulled my purse closer and opened it. I had never been more thankful, that I had a massive purse. There was a bottle of water, and two nutrition bars I always keep in there, just in case... I guess this would be my just in case. I left it all alone for now, just happy to have it in there. Then I grabbed my cell phone and Text Jasper.

**J gonna b stuck in here for like 6 hrs... will update when I know more 3 Bella! **

Jasper answered back quickly.

**Okay 3 Be safe and seduce the hell out of him! Heh heh.**

I flushed again, and quickly threw my phone back in my purse. It was painfully quiet, the only sounds were our breathing. Now that I was sitting here, all I could think about was James' presence beside me. I wish I knew why I was so attracted to him... why couldn't it be Edward, he was handsome, not to mention he actually liked me. But no I have to be attracted to someone who could barely stand to look at me.

I could feel the temperature increase already, my back was beginning to sweat, so I took off my jacket, and lay in beside me, beside my shoes. I looked over when I heard rustling, and was mesmerized by James removing his jacket, then folding his sleeves up to his elbows. My heart stopped when he then took off his tie, and undid a couple of his buttons. The tendons in his arms were bulging, his veins popping. Good Goddess I wanted him. I closed my eyes tightly and turned away, what on earth was I going to do for the next 5 hours, without getting fired from my job for trying to molest him.

"You guys okay in there?.. Brother." It was Emmett's voice, and James jumped up.

"Yeah its all good, any news on how they are comin along?" He asked, I held my breath waiting for a reply.

"Uh right on schedule, one hour down, five to go." James cursed, and my breath left me in a rush. "How you doin Bella, you hangin in there?" Emmett asked after a couple second.

"I'm fine, just a little tired." I said honestly.

"Well you are gonna be there for awhile, so lay down and close your eyes, it will make time go by faster." He said, then said goodbye.

I looked at my watch, and it was just after eight in the evening. My stomach rumbled, and I reached for my bag, pulling out the bars, and water. "Here." I said before throwing a nutrition bar to James. He greedily opened it, and ate, without saying a word. "A small thank you, would not kill you." I snapped. My patience was pretty much gone, with his rude attitude.

James stopped chewing and turned to stare at me, his eyes wide with surprise. "I apologize, my manners seem to have left me, thank you Isabella." He said all formal like. I nodded once, both satisfied and thrown off guard by his words. After finishing my bar, I quickly opened the water and took a couple swigs. Then handed it to James. He nodded a thanks and took a small drink before handing it back... I was not thrilled that he had his lips wrapped around my water bottle, as I took another small drink... I really wasn't dammit.

I decided to take Emmett's advice, and rolled up my jacket for a pillow. I faced away from James, and toward the wall, and closed my eyes. I didn't think I would actually fall asleep, but the next thing I knew, I was being engulfed in warmth, and something that smelled amazing, like pine, and musk... and James. I moaned a little burying my face into the delicious smell, and drifted off once again.

Some time later there was a jerking motion, that caused my stomach to drop, and my eyes to pop open. I must have rolled over at some point because I was facing towards James, who was laying down several feet away, his hair mussed, his eyes wide with fright. There was another jerk, and then the lights went completely out, not even the number light, it was pitch black.

I could hear James breathing getting more and more choppy, he was hyperventilating. I quickly sat up, and realized James had placed his jacket over me. Holding it, I quickly crawled over to him, and pulled him into an awkward hold, laying my head beside his, then grabbed his hand, and placed it on my chest like before. This time I didn't say anything, I just started the breathing exercise again. My eyes closed and after a couple minutes, James' breathing evened out.

"Thank you." James croaked after some more silence. He had moved his hand away, severing all contact, but he was close enough that his breath was ruffling my hair.

"Your welcome." I croaked back, my voice rough from sleep and disuse. "And thank you for letting me use your jacket." I said as I slowly sat up, and pushed back, so I was now leaning against a wall. The darkness was suffocating, and I couldn't even begin to know which direction my purse, with my cell phone, was in. "I wonder what time it is." I murmured, feeling more exhausted now, than I was before the nap.

A light flashed beside me, and I looked over, James watch had a light on it. "It's just after two, and I think they must be working on the elevator, which would be why it jerked." I nodded even though we were once more shrouded in darkness, and he couldn't see me, but I was just too tired to talk. I could feel my eyes drooping, my shoulders slumping, and my body drifting.

But then there was another jerk, and the lights came on, blinding me, making my eyes water. "James, Bella, you guys okay?" Came Emmett's voice he sounded panicked.

"Yeah we're fine." Came James' reply, it sounded stronger, now that the lights were on. "Tell me good news brother." He then said, standing up, and walking over to the speaker.

"Good news, you guys just gotta push the button on the floor you want, and it should get moving."

James' hand whipped out lightning fast, hitting the 7 button, and just like that the elevator moved, for like a second. When the elevator doors opened, the cool air that rushed in, causing a shiver to run through me. "I'll walk the stairs..." He trailed off looking over at me, his eyes turning cold once more. "I would appreciate it Isabella if you kept this embarrassing incident between the two of us, I would hate to fire you for being a gossip." With that he reached in and pressed the ground floor for me, and walked away. I could barely register his words, before the doors slid shut. I growled in frustration and stood up, collecting all my items, that's when I realized I still had James suit jacket in my arms. I would get it cleaned and give it back to him... honest!

The ground floor came quick, and when the doors opened I bolted out. A big burly man with dark hair, and handsome face came forward, with a confused look on his face. "Where is James." He asked and I instantly knew it was Emmett.

"He got off on the seventh floor, and said he would walk the stairs." Emmett cursed and ran to the stairwell and disappeared quickly, only the echo of his footsteps remained.

"Ma'am are you okay." Asked a short man in a uniform. I nodded and said a small thank you, before taking off outside and into my old truck. I was exhausted and just wanted to get home.

….

By the time I crawled into my front door it was just past 3 in the morning, I was exhausted, and could barely sit up to pee. I crawled into bed, and plugged my cell phone in to charge it. I had little over three hours to sleep, before I had to be up once again... tomorrow would be a long long day. I may have been cuddled up to James jacket, breathing in the heavenly scent as I fell asleep... maybe!

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	3. Ch3 Playing it Cool Kinda!

**Stephenie still owns it!**

Chapter 3: Playing it Cool... Kinda.!

*Beep * * Beep* * BEEP *

I woke up swingin, and growling... just a little really.

The time said 6:30, which means the alarm had been going off for fifteen minutes. "Ugh" I groand half falling half stumbling out of bed. This was gonna be a long effin day.

The little sleep I did have was filled with images of James, touching me, his scent in my nose... well that part was real thanks to his jacket... but whatever. I quickly ran for a shower, and got dressed, twisting my hair up and out of my face.

By the time I got to work, I was ten minutes late, and realized I forgot my phone on my bedside table. Grumbling I took the elevator, holding my breath the whole way, I definitely did not want to get caught in here two days in a row. But I got to my floor with no problems at all... everyone was hard at work, and I was almost at my desk, when I realized James' new secretary Jessica, was digging through my private drawers.

"What are you doing?" I snapped... little ol' me... snapped... I really was sleep deprived.

Jessica jumped up, guiltily, and backed a couple steps away. "I uh, I was looking for your column for today."

"Try again, I already handed that in." Jessica's face went a little green as she looked behind me.

"I know what you did to get this job." She whispered. "You should be ashamed."

My blood boiled, I mean really boiled. "The only thing I did to get this job was work my ass off, and put up with shit you couldn't even imagine." I raged, my voice high, and confident. "If your trying to say that I fucked my way up, than you have another thing comin, you should watch your mouth, and learn the truth before you start spewing lies." By the end of my rant, Jessica was looking smug, and I knew... I knew he was close, listening, watching my downfall. I turned around and sure enough there he was arms crossed and nose flared. _I should have stayed home_

"My office, NOW, both of you." Jessica's air of superiority faltered, and so did her smug smile, as we turned toward his office. I was just numb, and horrified that anyone would think that I could stoop so low as to sleep with anyone for a position. I sulked as I dropped into one of the two seats, across from James. "First I would like to say, the middle of a work space is not the best place to lose your temper." I wanted to say _uh helllooooo... look who's talkin_, but I kept it shut. Then he turned to Jessica and leaned forward. "Miss Stanley, what does your position entail here." He asked smoothing out his tie.

Jessica gave a big smile, and flicked her hair back. "Well Mr. Masters my job entails, perfecting your coffee, answering phones, and fixing your daily schedules." She said proudly. My mouth dropped... that was it... I slaved away for five years, and she is barely scraping the surface.

"That is right... would you like to know what Isabella's entailed when she was in your position?" Before Jessica could answer he continued. "She too perfected my coffee, answered phones, and fixed my daily schedules, while reading through three to four dozen columns, proof reading and categorizing each one before sending them to me, occasionally dropping off and picking up my dry cleaning. Staying after hours to organize my filing cabinets, for the simple fact that I don't fucking feel like it... not to mention being on call..." He trailed of as Jessica's eyes widened. "When Isabella said she did shit you couldn't even imagine, this is was she was referring to... do you think you could handle that kind of work Miss Stanley.

Jessica stared on, her face pale, smile completely faded. "I- I mean if that's what you want Mr."

"What I want..." He interrupted. "Is for my work place to be drama free, and that cant happen when my secretary with only two jobs, is snooping through an employee 's personal belonging's, an employee who keeps to herself and has never been a problem, in the five years she has been here I have never heard a single complaint... go pack your shit, leave my office, and consider this a life lesson, you are no longer in high school, you need to grow up now Miss Stanley, and keep your trap shut." He then turned to me, who was equally wide eyed, he was about to speak, but Jessica was still sitting there. So he turned back to her. "Do I need to spell this out for you. F-I-R-E-D Get out of my office... Now." Jessica jumped up, and stormed out, tears in her eyes. And I just couldn't find it in myself to feel sorry for her."

Then he turned back to me, and the anger had not faded... uh oh. "I didn't think I would have this kind of problem with you B- Isabella, but here I am... next time, a little less drama when your being confronted with something as ridiculous as a made up affair between us." He sneered. Ouch.

I nodded and got up, without another word, and was about to walk to my desk. "One more thing, I need you to multitask until you can train someone to take over your secretary position." Well shiiit...

I turned around and being the cranky bitch I was today, I talked back... well kinda. "If you want me to work two jobs, I deserve to be paid for two jobs." James narrowed his eyes at me, leaning back in his chair, and crossing his arms. I would not back down, I would not back down, I would not back...

"Done." Holy Shiit! done, he said done. I nodded my head and walked away, before I could squeal.

So I walked to my old desk, and made it my home once more, my column could wait, until I readied his schedule, and read through all the other columns.

…

By the end of the day... I was tired, I mean so tired I stumbled around, my house, grabbing the leftovers from the dinner Jasper and Alice had at my place. All I know is that it had shrimp in it. By the time I made it to my room my eyes were practically sealed shut, and it was only seven in the evening. I blindly set my alarm, then fell fast asleep cuddled up to * cough * * cough * a great smelling jacket!

…

I woke up the next morning with a start...a memory crashed into my brain, and I couldn't believe I didn't think of it sooner... James had almost slipped up and called me Bella. A grin broke out over my face... maybe I did affect him in the elevator... even just a little tiny bit.

So with a smile on my face, I got up half an hour before my alarm, and enjoyed a hot shower. It was Friday and I couldn't be happier. I was going out for drinks with Alice and Jasper after work, so I decided to dress more casual so I wouldn't have to change afterward. I put on a pair of black flare dress pants, that are more comfortable than my joggers, and they seriously make my ass look great... at least that's what Alice tells me... and a blue cap sleeved shirt that dipped a little, not too much, just enough. I put on a pair of ballet flats because Alice would be dragging me out to the dance floor, and I cant do that in heels. Then to top it off I grabbed a matching blazer, and twisted my hair up, into a clip. I ran a little lip gloss and mascara over my face, and I was done.

…

The day was long, and visions of tequila dancing in my head, was the only thing that helped. James was extra bitchy, most likely because he was short staffed, though I was actually balancing both jobs surprisingly well. By 5:20, I was sooo ready. My personal line rang and I picked it up swiftly. "Isabella Swan, how can I help you?"

"Oh Bella, good, listen you so better not be ditching us tonight, cause Rosalie is coming out, and so is her new beau." It was Alice, in a dither.

"Hey Pixie, no bailing I promise, but I swear that if you don't have a tequila margarita waiting for me, I may have to disown you and steal your hottie boyfriend." Alice laughed loudly on the other end, before promising to have a drink ready.

"If you need a massage Jasper is really good at that, I don't mind if you use him." She giggled.

"Oh hunny I know his massages, and I am so far beyond that I need me a hard core spa week, with those bulky men, in robes, workin me over." I laughed, and my face heated, I couldn't believe I said that... at work to boot.

"Oh Bella, your birthday is just around the corner, I think I just figured out the perfect gift."

"Hey now, you know how I feel about gifts, I can pay myself." I grumbled, but Alice was already saying goodbye, and hanging up.

Since I had just finished writing my piece, and was ready to go, I decided to check in with James, and head out early.

As I stood up to do that, I realized James was right behind me, his arms crossed, eyes narrowed. "Do you take a lot of personal calls Isabella?" _Tequila Margarita, Tequila Margarita_ I think to myself and begin to smile.

"Not often nope, I apologize if you feel I said anything inappropriate." James said nothing, not even a nod. So I continued. "I was actually going to come find you, and tell you I was done for the day, unless you need me."

James' eyes flashed and he took a small half step forward. Then he stopped himself and shook his head, his lips thinning into a mulish line. "Its fine Isabella, I was just coming to tell you I was leaving anyway."

"Oh, well okay then." I said, feeling almost giddy, I grabbed my purse, and jacket, and started walking towards the elevator. "Have a good weekend Mr. Masters." I said as I pushed the down button.

He nodded and then surprised the hell out of me, when he stepped into the elevator too. I would have thought he'd start taking the stairs all the time, considering the shape he was in when it broke down. The ride down was a little like deja vu, and I have to say I was really thankful, when we hit the ground floor, we both let out loud breaths, like we were thinking the same thing... which made me laugh, I looked over in time, to see James smile. I think I may have stopped moving, holy hell in five years, that is the first time I had ever seen him smile. I looked away quickly and walked out, before I made a fool of myself by drooling, and quickly walked away, if I thought he was the most attractive man before, now there was no doubt about it. His smile, had shown me two very sexy hidden dimples, dimples that made my mouth water.

…

"Yay, she's here." Yelled Alice, as I walked into the nightclub Twilight, she handed me my drink, and I moaned around the first mouth full. "How was your day?" She asked as I got comfortable sitting across from her and Jasper.

"Is it strange that I finally just saw my boss smile for the first time in... five years." I asked, in a low conspiratorial voice. Alice clasped her hand over her mouth, and Jasper's eyebrows rose over his hairline.

"Oh no wonder you look shell shocked, you liked the smile Bella, you sly gal you." Alice giggled, and I groaned.

"Whats so funny?" Asked Rosalie, as she walked up to the table... she was alright, I just didn't know her very well.

"Oh we were just talking about Bella's Boss." Alice giggled again. I rolled my eyes, knowing it was inevitable that she would spill, and I was just gonna let it happen, until a big burly guy walked over and wrapped an arm around Rose. I think I swallowed my tongue, what a small world. I reached under the table and gave Alice a good kick. She looked over at me, and I shook my head, eyes the size of saucers I'm sure.

"Well spill what about your boss." Rosalie said, her impatience clear... the woman did not like to wait.

"Oh uh, I was telling them about how we were stuck in an elevator... that's all." I finally murmured. Then turned to the hulk. "Uh hi Emmett." Emmett gave me a big smile.

"Well hello Bella Swan, good to see your still in one piece after the elevator incident..." He leaned in closer, and kept his voice low. "And thank you for helping James through that, if you wouldn't have been there, shit would have hit the fan, and that just wouldn't have been cool." My face heated at his praise, and I nodded. He stood back up to his full height, and gave Rosalie a kiss. "Be back in five Rosie." Then he walked away.

Everyone was staring at me, and I looked down at my drink, well the empty glass, I just shrugged and said. "What, he was the speaker when the elevator quit." Then I scooted out before Rosalie could sit, and headed to the bartender, to order another drink. By the time I returned Rosalie and Emmett were sitting across from Alice and Jasper, and I had a feeling this may be a fifth wheel kinda night.

I sat on a chair closest to Alice, and listened to them all talking... well kinda, I was more interested in watching my drink, and draining it.

Five drinks and a fuzzy smile later, and it was definitely a fifth wheel kinda night. I got up and walked to the dance floor, without much thought... did I mention I don't drink much... and when I do... it don't take much to get me drunk... The dance floor was packed, and so dancing by myself, didn't look to awkward or strange. So when a good song came on, and more bodies came up and started to sway, I closed my eyes and got into the music.

The bass felt like it was vibrating in my bones creating a hypnotizing hum, the lyrics were echoing in my head with a soothing tone. I was not a big fan or nine inch nails, but this song always got me.

_I wanna fuck you like an animal, _

_I want to feel you from the inside,_

My body was swaying, and I was startled to awareness when someone grabbed my waste, and pulled me against... holy hell dude had an erection. He smelled of stale cigarette's and beer. I tried to pull away, but he held me close, captive. "Come on baby lets get out of here." Erection guy slurred out.

I could feel my panic rise, and I shook my head. "No thanks, let me go please." I yelled out. The man laughed and pulled me closer against him. I pulled at his hands, digging my nails into his skin. At that moment I wished I had nails like Alice or Rosalie.

Panic was starting to consume me, and I was freezing up. There were so many people around, and not one person was looking my way, not one person was paying attention. I looked over toward my table, praying Jasper or Emmett would see me, but they were laughing at something, in there own foursome world. "Let me go." I yelled over the music, my voice could barely be heard from my own ears, and he was slowly making his way to the edge of the dance floor, an emergency exit right beside it.

I could feel my heart beating like crazy, and my stomach was starting to turn. I needed to get someones attention... and quick, really quick. I started to struggle, elbowing, stomping on his feet, I tried to head bunt him, but I was too short, that I only hit his chest... his big broad chest. I screamed for help, but no one even looked, and the more I fought, and struggled, the more the man laughed. I lifted my feet off the floor, and kicked out, hitting two women, who just kept dancing, I tried again this time a man that was facing away from me, at first I didn't think I would get a reaction from him either, and there was no one else, but he turned around, almost like slow motion, and to say I was relieved was an understatement... James... it was James, he was wearing ripped jeans and an untucked button down black shirt, with a couple buttons undone.

James furrowed his eyebrows, most likely trying to figure out what he was seeing, then he must have noticed the fear in my eyes...

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	4. Ch4 Reversed Roles!

**Stephenie Meyer owns the characters still!**

Chapter 4: Reversed Roles!

James walked forward, and ripped me from the mans arms, then I was standing shaking, as I turned around, I couldn't believe my eyes, James had the beefed up man by the throat, holding him against the wall, and was feeding him shots to the face. I felt like everything around me was fogging up.

All I could hear was my breathing and the quick beat of my heart. My throat hurt, and I felt almost like I was suffocating. I grabbed at my throat, wondering what the hell was wrong with me.

Then James was in front of me, he was saying something, but I couldn't hear him. It felt like I was submerged under water. James grabbed a hold of my arms, shaking me, getting my attention. "Bella, you need to slow your breathing down, your hyperventilating." He said, I could finally hear him. Oh crap I could hear what he was saying, but I couldn't slow my breathing, I grasped my chest, and shook my head wildly.

Next thing I know James is pushing me through a door, cold air hitting my face... but damn it, it had the opposite effect the cool air felt wrong against my skin. "Oh god I …. I cant breathe." I choked out, my panic growing with every breath.

James grabbed my hand that was on my chest and placed it over his own. "Mimic my breathing Bella, breathe with me." The action was not lost on me, he was using my own mojo. But it did work, I closed my eyes and felt it, concentrated on it. We must have stood there for awhile, because by the time I was back to normal, people were leaving. "Thats better." He murmured, taking his hand off mine. I let my hand weakly drop, and took a shuttering breath. This nights events floating back to me again and again. "Are you gonna be okay?" He asked his voice rough.

"Yes.. and thank you... I – I don't know what would have happened if you weren't there." I stated, looking up at him.

James narrowed his eyes slightly and nodded. "You should watch who you dance with, and associate with Isabella." Ah so we were back to jerky formalities.

"Well its a good thing I wasn't dancing with him, isn't it. Although that didn't stop him from trying to drag me away." I bit back. James nodded and then opened the door beside us, so I could enter once more. The foursome were still sitting at the table, laughing away... and I had never felt so unimportant in my whole life... how could they not know what happened, I just had the most horrifying, scary experience, and they didn't even know I was missing from the table.

I walked over as best I could with my head held high, and grabbed my purse that was sitting on the table. As soon as I grabbed it, all eyes were on me. Jasper's eyes widened when he seen me. "Bells what happened?" He asked, obviously I looked a little rough from the struggle. I didn't say anything just shook my head.

"I'm going home... goodnight." Jasper was about to say something else but James came up beside me.

"Hey Bro, there you are, I was wonderin' if you were still here." Came Emmett's boisterous voice.

James glared at him. "How long was Isabella away from this table?" He looked around and no one answered. "How long have you four been sitting here without her presence?" he questioned again. Still no answer. I tried to interrupt him, but he shook his head. "I have never known you to be so careless with women Emmett, what the hell." I turned to walk away, hating conflict. But James grabbed my arm and pulled me back. "While you four were in your own world, Bella had a man try to drag her away, both kicking and screaming, he would have done it too, if she hadn't kicked at me to get my attention... this is why you stay in groups at a bar, not let your supposed friends fends for themselves." James grip was like granite, and I was feeling so foolish, and utterly humiliated.

"Let me go." I growled out. Both shaken, and fed up. "I want to go home, and I don't want to be humiliated further, thank you." My voice was shaky, and I felt so weak... it was just too much for me, I needed to rest my eyes... my brain. James growled and let me go. With that, I walked away... from all of them, and thank Goddess there was a cab sitting outside, and I quickly jumped in, and fed him my address.

The ride home was quick, and after paying I bolted up my stairs, slamming and locking my door. It seemed so quiet, and friggin spooky, I loved living alone, never had a problem, until right this minute. Groaning I walked upstairs and started to run a bath, to get the scent of stale cigarettes and beer off my skin... out of my head.

I stripped down and dipped a toe in, then pulled it out quickly. Ouch it was too hot. I was about to turn the cold water on to cool it a bit but there was a loud knock on the door. Groaning, I figured its probably Alice and Jasper feeling sorry for themselves that they pretty much failed as friends tonight. I grabbed my bath towel and wrapped it around myself then ran downstairs to the door. "Listen guys I really don't wanna talk ab..." I cut myself off as I opened my door, because it was so not Jas and Ali...

It was James, standing there looking completely unsure... and fidgety. "Oh uh..." I looked down at my barely there towel and felt my face heat. "Come in." I finally said, stepping back, so he could enter.

James was looking anywhere but at me, and as we continued to stand there, I was feeling more and more uneasy. "Listen I just wanted to be sure that you made it home, and see that you are okay." He finally said, then scrubbed the back of his neck.

"Oh yeah I'm fine... thanks to you." I reached out and gave his arm a small squeeze, then pulled away. "Really though, thank you so much, you saved me from going through one of the worst things any woman could go through." James looked up into my eyes, and his cheeks actually reddened.

"Well your welcome... I should go, see you at work Isabella."

He was about to turn away, when I caught sight of his hand, it was swollen and there were cuts in the knuckles. "Wait, I can clean up your hand, its the least I can do." James looked down surprised, like he hadn't realized he was hurt.

"No no that's fine, I can do that at home." He said absently.

"Please, its the least I can do." I practically begged. James looked towards the door, then back at me, and finally he nodded and stepped forward. I directed him toward my bathroom, and walked behind him. "Sit there." I pointed to the toilet seat. "And I will be right back." I said as I walked out. I quickly went to my room and grabbed my robe, It wasn't much better since it only hit mid thigh, but hell it was better than a towel that could unravel any minute. I dropped the towel after tightly fastening the tie on my robe, and was about to walk out... until I realized his suit jacket was all rumpled on my bed. I groaned and stepped forward, shoving it under my pillow... I would get it cleaned... really!

Now that my night was wearing off, I was feeling a tad giddy, my hard assed boss was sitting in my bathroom waiting for me. My hard assed boss who I haven't been able to stop thinking about in like five years. I shook my head, trying to keep my hormones in check, and walked back in. James, was sitting there looking all kinds of uncomfortable.

I reached in the cupboard below the sink, and grabbed my small first aid kit. Then I got to work. We were both quiet the whole time, our breaths the only sound... and the drip drip drip of my tap leaking into my bath water. "I'm sorry for interrupting you." James finally said, and nodded toward the bath.

I shrugged and continued. "No biggie it was too hot anyway." I said matter of factly.

I was done shorty after, and James was once again standing at my door ready to leave. He lifted his injured hand and looked at it pointedly, then said "thank you." I nodded and with that he opened my door and practically ran down my front stairs. I was about to close it, when I seen Jasper and Alice pull up. Jasper just stepped out, and he spotted me.

"Not tonight." I said firmly. Jasper opened his mouth to speak and I shook my head. "I said not tonight Jas, go home." Jasper looked down, and I slammed my door, locking it again. By the time I made it back to my bath, the temperature had cooled perfectly and I climbed in.

…

To say my weekend was crap, would be an understatement, I had a hangover from a drunk I didn't get to enjoy, my muscles ached all over, from the horrid struggle, and I was coming down with a cold... freaking joy... oh and I may be ignoring Jasper's phone calls.

When I got to my desk, I was weary of all of the papers, I knew I had a lot to proofread, but damn I wished I didn't. About half hour before lunch James came out of hi office. "Isabella?" He called.

I looked up startled from my thoughts. "Yes Mr. Masters." I asked, standing up. He waved me into his office, and told me to sit.

"I know your column is about spicing up relationships..." He started, making me fidget. "But today I want you to write about your experience the other night, make women aware that even with friends, shit happens." I was momentarily shocked into silence. "Is that a problem Isabella?" He asked, his voice laced with menace.

"No not at all, I think its a great idea." With that he dismissed me... like this weekend never happened, although I don't know why I was surprised by that.

So I went back to work, first finishing the other columns, and finally writing my own... it took me longer than usual, trying to figure out the best way to start... but when I did, it poured out of me, almost like a faucet, and when I was done, I felt lighter, free... it was great.

After reading it over, I brought it to James' office, and placed it before him. "I kept your name anonymous, I didn't think you would want it published."

James nodded. "You assumed right." He growled, and waved me away with his hand. "You can leave for the day, your already on overtime." I looked at my watch and my eyes widened it was close to 7 in the evening.

"Goodnight." I said softly, then I left.

Its like something would happen and he would soften, then he would go right back to jerk... "Damn Beautiful bastard." I mumble as I hit the elevator button.

"What was that." Came a deep voice, I jumped and spun around, coming face to face with James... uh oh...

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	5. Ch5 What?

**Stephenie Meyer Owns these Characters!**

Chapter 5: What?

I stared at James, with something that probably looked like 'duh' written across my face. "Hmm?" I finally questioned, like I didn't just hear him loud and clear.

"What did you just call me?" He asked and I gulped. I was screwed either way. I both insulted, and said something inappropriate.

And of course being me, my face started to light up like rudolphs freaking nose. "Uh I didn't say anything." I said stupidly. James mouth turned into a slash, his eyes flashing with anger.

"I didn't peg you for stupid Isabella, you definitely did say something." He said louder, cue groan. "And I don't feel I did anything to have you calling me a bastard." His voice was indignant outrage. Of course he didn't hear the beautiful part... I didn't know whether to be disappointed in that or thrilled. "If you don't like me, or your job, please feel free to leave Isabella, don't let me hold you back."

My eyes widened. "What no, I love working here." I blurted out, feeling a little sick. "And I didn't call you a bastard... exactly." I mumbled the last part, my face flaming. Oh man I so could not tell him what I said... geez this was becoming a hell of a day... and where the hell was the stinking elevator. I reached back and pushed the button again. There was no one else in the office, I notice, everyone was gone, and I was relieved that no one else was here to witness my downfall, cause like I said either way I am so screwed.

James cocked his head to the side, and leaned forward slightly. "Then what is it that you did call me _Isabella_." The way he said my name was like a sneer, and I paled... a lot.

"Uh... a uh beautiful bastard?" I mumbled out, and it sounded more like a question, than an answer. If there was any time I wanted the ground to open up and swallow me whole... now was that time! I could finally feel the rumble of the elevator getting closer... the elevator doors opening up would definitely suffice.

James scrunched his brows together, like he was trying to figure out a difficult equation. The doors finally opened and I stepped in. "I'm just gonna go drown myself in a puddle of water now." I said in a sweet voice, I swear my head felt like it wanted to detach from my body, from the overflow of blood in it, then I pushed the button for the ground floor. James opened his mouth, as if to say something, but the doors began to close, and he snapped his mouth shut.

Can you say embarrassing, I had never felt so humiliated in my life. I had both insulted and complimented my boss in the same breath...

When I pulled up at home, Jasper was parked in the driveway. I groaned, this was just not going to get better, was it. As soon as I opened my car door, he was already beside me. "You cant ignore me forever Bells." He told me, his arms crossed, looking pissed.

"Oh don't even Jasper, you cant even think about being pissed, you and your girlfriend were the ones wanting me to come out, then you don't even notice that I'm missing... nope you don't get to be pisse." I growled out, pointing at him angrily. Jasper's glare faltered and his arms fell to his sides.

"Listen I'm sorry, so fuckin sorry, and if I could go back, and change it I would..." He trailed off and I huffed.

"Listen I'm not saying its your fault... because it wasn't... but to come back afterward, after like forty minutes, and see that non of you even knew I was missing... well it fuckin' hurt, a lot." I could feel my lip tremble and turned toward the house. "Look I'm fine, nothing happened, so lets just forget about it... I'm tired and stressed and I really just want to be left alone." With that I walked away from Jas... he would always be a good friend... but I realized he wasn't my best friend... not anymore, and it hurt a lot. I had tried to keep my mind off of the fact that he didn't notice me missing, but now that its at the front of my mind, I had to face it, and get past it.

So I spent the rest of my night watching sappy movies and crying my face off...

...

When my alarm went off the next morning, my throat hurt from the cold, my brain hurt from the cry, I thought of calling in sick, then when I looked in the mirror... I really thought of calling in sick... but I would have to talk to James, since he would be the one answering till I got in... I must have sat there for several minutes before making up my mind and picking up the phone. I had been there for five years and only ever taken 3 sick days... I deserved a day dammit.

"James Masters speaking, how can I help you." Came James' voice, he sounded tired, and my stomach turned.

"Hey Mr. Masters its Bella- Isabella, listen I cant come into work today, I don't feel well, I'm coming down with a cold." I said, praying he wouldn't mention the day before.

"Isabella, if this is about yesterday..." He trailed off.

"It's not." I quickly interrupted. "I'm sick, my head hurts, and I can barely keep my eyes open."

"Well alright then, would you like me to fill in your column, or would you like to work on it from home." Ah hell, I was leaving him with a busload of work.

"I can write it from home, I can fax it over by six tonight." I said, my head sagging back into my bed.

"I would like to say yes, but the fax machine has been on the fritz this week." He grumbled, I could hear him shuffling papers.

I could feel my eyes trying to close. "Okay, how about I come there in the afternoon then, I just need to rest a little longer?" I murmured...

I woke up to someone banging on my door... holy shit, I woke up... that means I fell asleep talking to MY BOSS! "No no no no no." I repeated as I reached around for my phone. Sure enough it was on my bed, flipped open. "Oh goddess please tell me this isn't happening." I moaned and checked the call history... last call was 28 minutes long... he stayed on the phone for twenty minutes with me passed out... I felt like I may be sick. I heard another loud knock and looked over at the time... it was passed six in the evening... I slept all day. I didn't get my column written.

I was halfway down the stairs when the knock erupted again. "I'm coming, hold on dammit." I yelled loudly, and the knock died instantly.

I opened my door only to come face to face with James... I cant seem to get away from the man lately... only because I wanted to I'm sure. "I am so sorry Mr. Masters, I cant believe I fell asleep on the phone with you... uh and I didn't get my column written tonight." I groaned out. Pulling my hair from my face.

James was standing there, saying nothing. Just totally silent. So I stopped rambling. And stepped back, waving him in. "About yesterday." He finally said as the door closed behind him.

I groaned and covered my face. "Can we just forget that ever happened." I murmured into my hands.

"No." James whispered... really close to me, I mean I could feel his breath against my neck. I moved my hands and looked up... and up... he was towering over me, his chest mere inches from mine, his one arm was stretched out, leaning his hand on the wall behind me. "I cant forget." He mumbled and lifted his other hand to my face, tucking stray hair behind my ear...

"Um what are you doing?" I whispered out. Scared if I spoke too loud I would break this spell, but wondering what the hell was going on.

"Something that I have wanted to do for longer than I can stand to remember." He whispered, than leaned his head down, he tilted my chin with his thumb and finger...

**I cant stop writing about these two! I'm thinkin James needs a POV so we know his side!**

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	6. Ch6 Truth!

**Stephenie Owns all these Sexy Beasts Dammit! boo hoo! lol**

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Chapter 6: Truth!

James POV

"If you don't like me, or your job, please feel free to leave Isabella, don't let me hold you back."

I told Bella, hoping like hell she wouldn't accept that."What no, I love working here." She blurted out, causing me to sigh in relief. "And I didn't call you a bastard... exactly." She told me in a smaller voice, her face becoming red. I wanted to yell, I damn well heard her call me a bastard, after everything I did for her this weekend, and I sure in the hell haven't done anything to her, hell I may be a hard ass, but I keep things professional, as hard as it is with her, she should be thankful for that.

"Then what is it that you did call me _Isabella_." I threw all of venom I could muster in that, letting her know I was not playing games here, and as her superior she needed to respect me... if she didn't than we can not continue to work together smoothly.

"Uh... a uh beautiful bastard?" What the hell... did I just hear that right.. what did that mean, did she find me attractive, was my actions making her feel unwanted. I was about to respond, saying what... I have no fuckin clue, but before I did, she was already in the elevator, the doors closing, I snapped my mouth shut, and watched them close, blocking Bella from my view.

I had to do something, talk to her ask her how she feels... but first I need to decide how to go about it, I don't want to scare her, or make her uncomfortable.

By the time I got home, I was beat, I read over Bella's column several times, and once again feeling overwhelmed by the memory of her frightened eyes. I remember it so clearly. I had seen her on the dance floor, with the man holding her. But I thought it was a lover, I had quickly turned away, because I had a sudden flash of jealousy, and I didn't want to do something that would make me look foolish to my employee. So when I felt a soft kick, and turned to see what the fuck... I was surprised to see her looking more than a little frightened... as soon as I seen her to safety, I beat the fuck out of that guy, then I stuck the bouncers on him, they promised to dispose of him.

When I helped her gain control of her breathing like she did me, it felt good to be able to pay her back, to even it out.

I threw the column to the printers, before leaving the office, without a single correction, she was pretty perfect when she wrote, no matter what she wrote about.

I fell in and out of sleep all night, my head consumed with thought of Bella, and what I would say to her, or how I would say it.

By the time I got to work I was vibrating from the nervousness of seeing her. My company phone rang, and I answered on the second ring. "James Masters speaking, how can I help you." I asked, while organizing papers on my desk.

"Hey Mr. Masters its Bella- Isabella, listen I cant come into work today, I don't feel well, I'm coming down with a cold." Came Bella's gravelly voice. My heart stuttered.

"Isabella, if this is about yesterday..." I said, not quite knowing how to finish it.

"It's not. I'm sick, my head hurts, and I can barely keep my eyes open." She said, she did sound sick.

"Well alright then, would you like me to fill in your column, or would you like to work on it from home." I didn't want to ask, but damn it was gonna be a long day, without writing a column... that I would be horrible at.

"I can write it from home, I can fax it over by six tonight." She said her voice starting to sound faint

"I would like to say yes, but the fax machine has been on the fritz this week." I lied, needing to see her.

She took a minute to respond. "Okay, how about I come there in the afternoon then, I just need to rest a little..." Her words trailed off, and there there was nothing.

"Isabella?" I asked, looking at my phone, making sure it hadn't disconnected... nope it hadn't. "Isabella are you there." I heard a soft moan from the other end, and I stopped breathing. I could hear hers on the other end, all soft breaths and moans. "Uh Isabella are you okay." I asked, even though I was pretty damn sure she passed out...

I must have listened for a good twenty minutes, sitting at the edge of my seat, and picturing myself holding her, telling her it will be alright. The long buried feelings I had for her, jumped back to the surface, and just before I hung up, I heard her soft breathy voice, say my name.

…

I worked like a mad dog all day, first proofreading, then setting the newspaper, and when I had everyone else's done, I quickly put together Bella's... at least I tried, it was nowhere near as good as hers.

Then by six, I was out of the office, racing to Bella's place, to make sure she was okay, and to talk to her, tell her the truth, and coax the truth from her.

I started knocking loudly on her door and waited... I tried again several minutes later, and then a third time when I still wasn't getting a response... but finally, I heard Bella calling out that she would be right there, so I stopped.

When she finally answered, words and thought went out the window, she really must have been out of it, because the only thing she was wearing was a white muscle shirt that barely covered her belly button, and a pair of boycut panties. I was stuck, solid in place, and good god, I felt like my erection was gonna pop right out of my pants.

Bella started to apologize for falling asleep on the phone, and missing deadline, but I could barely hear her over the blood rushing in my ears, the heat running through my body. I just couldn't talk. Bella finally waved me in, and as soon as the door shut I mentioned the day before.

She covered her face, and asked if we could forget... _forget_... there was no way I could do that, so I stepped closer, telling her just that. When she looked back up, I couldn't help myself for another second, I leaned in and moved a stray hair from her face.

She asked what I was doing... and I answered honestly. "Something that I have wanted to do for longer than I can stand to remember." and with that, I tilted her chin up, and lightly meshed our lips together. It was like a spark ran through me, a hot electrifying spark. Bella moaned and leaned into me, her arms circling around me, and that action was a thousand beautiful words for me... she felt the same. I wrapped my arms around her waist, and put more pressure into the kiss, nibbling on her lips, running my tongue along her lower lip.

But then I forced myself to pull away slightly and leaned my forehead against hers, our breath mingling together. "We need to talk about this." I murmured, and I couldn't stop myself from tasting her lips once more, before severing all contact.

Bella gave a disappointed groan as I moved out of her reach, but nodded her head...

Bella's POV

I was leaned up against the wall feeling all kinds of good, and thinking James was too far away. I cant believe this is happening. The thought that he may be as interested as I am... hell even half as interested would be freakin incredible. "Sure, we can talk." Holy hell was that sexy purr me? I could feel goose bumps break over my body as James' body heat left me, and I looked down... "Uh holy crap." I said embarrassed, I was practically naked.

James chuckled and I snapped my head up. "I don't mind." He said shyly... his cheeks reddend. Well damn speechless, he really was sexy when he blushed. I grabbed his hand and pulled him toward my living room, if we were going to talk, I at least wanted to be comfortable. James took a seat on my oversized black suede couch, and as soon as I grabbed my throw blanket, off the back, I sat beside him, covering my legs.

"So..." I said not knowing where to start.

"So... indeed." James said, most likely stumped too. "How about the beginning?" He questioned after a long bout of awkward silence. I nodded, and gestured for him to start. "Alright, I guess it started when I first hired you..."

**There now you got a lil taste of James POV... I wont be doing his POV much just so ya know!**

**Review please!**


	7. Ch7 New!

**Lol I know I know where have I been! Well iv'e been moving, and workin, and all that fun stuff, but here is another very long overdue chapter!**

**Steph M. Owns it all!**

Chapter 7: New!

Bella's POV

For hours... James and I sat in my living room, talking about, well our mutual crush for the past five years, how he hadn't even thought for a second that I would feel the same as he did, Than he had caught a conversation I was having with Jasper shortly after I started working there, and instantly thought we were a couple, which is why he decided to be a jerk, a knee jerk reaction, to keep himself from being hurt.

I was a little disappointed that so much time was waisted, but hey hopefully things would look up from here... Like maybe getting myself a hot piece of boss ass!

It was clear after two in the morning by the time we were silent, everything that had to be talked about was aired and resolved. I didn't want him to leave, but at the same time, I knew I couldn't stay awake much longer. I was leaning against his shoulder, my bare legs still covered with my blanket. James was flipping through my channels on the television, seemingly not wanting to leave about as much as I didn't want him to.

Damn my shy ass, why couldn't I just say, hey, will you hold me tonight... But noo here I am falling asleep rather uncomfortably, against his shoulder, instead of speakin up. Before I could udder another word... Like I was going to anyway, I fell asleep.

I woke awhile later to James shifting and lifting me in his arms, the blanket falling from my legs, making me shiver from the cold air. I instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck, as he carried me to my bedroom, James lay me down on my mattress, and halfway releasing me, he froze... a chuckle escaped his mouth, before he released me the rest if the way.

I opened my eyes to see what he was laughing at, and noticed his eyes were fixed on the bed beside me, I looked over and *cue the blush * there in a crumpled heap was his freaking jacket... Oh my goddess please don't tell me thats a drool mark, a dried out crusted drool mark from my sick sleep... * groan * "I'm flattered!" He murmured leaning closer to me, kissing my lips lightly. "But I think we need to give my poor jacket a break. " He said in a mock stern voice, while removing his button up shirt and laying it beside me, leaving him in a snug muscle shirt! Good goddess he is so freakin sexy.

"I really had every intention of getting it cleaned" I mumbled, pulling the jacket, and now shirt towards me, covering my red face, and taking a deep breath, his scent being dragged in through my nose. I couldn't stop the contented moan that escaped my mouth.

James laughed out loud, his hand tugging on his blazer out of my hands. "Give it up Bella, or you will end up with a whole outfit pretty soon!" Bella giggled unexpectedly, as she imagined a ticked off James leaving in boxers, with socks pulled up to his knees. She finally let the jacket go, keeping a tight hold on the button up shirt. James leaned over closely, and whispered against her ear. "Do me a favor?" he questioned, almost shyly. I nodded slowly, shivering when his warm breath touched my sensitive neck. He put his hand over mine, holding the shirt. "Put this on before I leave, so I can see it on you." His voice became gruff by the end.

I looked up at James, his body so close to mine that I could feel the heat, and I nodded mutely to him.

James smiled widely, and leaned down to kiss me soundly. My arms reached around him blindly, clinging to him. James lifted me up to straddle his lap, the roughness of his pants, sending shocks up my bare legs. James was reaching for my small undershirt and I froze. "I promise I wont peek." He murmured against my lips, before smoothly and quickly, pulling my shirt over my head. The cold air hitting my bare skin made me shiver, and feel vulnerable and self conscious.

James pulled away and reached beside us, grabbing his button up shirt, I put my arms into the sleeves and he looked down to do the buttons up. A loud groan left his lips, and a finger ran across an already hardened nipple, causing me to gasp. "Fuck... Ok fine I looked." He breathed, pulling me into a bone melting kiss.

His fingers nimbly worked on the buttons, as he slowed our kiss down. I was like a puddle, in his lap, when he pulled away, our breathing ragged. "I should go, we both need to sleep." I nodded as I pulled him closer.

I took a deep breath, and threw caution to the wind. "Stay with me tonight?" I questioned quietly, James froze. "Just to sleep... Hold me." I quickly threw in, so he knew I didn't mean sex... not yet. James relaxed against me again, and after slight hesitation, he nodded his head. "Only if you want to." I told him, suddenly feeling like I was pressuring him.

James chuckled in my hair and pulled away from me, so he could look into my eyes. "There is nowhere I would rather be... I hesitated because I had to think of how long it would take to get to my place, and change in the morning, but then I remembered, I have some in the vehicle I picked up from the cleaners on the way here"

"oh" I whispered quietly, James pulled me closer to him, and layed us both down, rolling us to our sides. He groaned and moved away for a minute, removing his pants, and throwing them to the floor beside him. My heart started to beat faster, as he pulled me against him once more, the skin on skin contact felt so good.

But sleep took me swiftly, as soon as the blankets were tucked around us, and my head was resting on his strong chest, I was out like a light.

I could feel something pressing against the length of me, from behind, strong arms holding me against a hard chest. It took me less than a second to realize it was James, since his scent was all around me. James was breathing heavily in my ear, his erection pressing against my bottom. I knew he was sleeping, and it was beyond hard to stop myself from grinding against him, my hormones kicking into high gear. It was still dark out, maybe 4 in the morning, but the incessant poking behind me, and the scent of James, was becoming too much for me to fight. I pushed back against James' hardness, unable to hold back a second longer.

James let out a long moan, pushing back against me, his arms tightening further around my chest and waist. A push and pull rhythm was quickly found, and James was kissing my neck and nipping at my earlobe, sleep a thing of the past. I gasped as his teeth sank into my shoulder, the same time he pinched a nipple through my new shirt. I was soaking wet, I could feel my arousal dripping down my thighs, James' erection pressing firmly against me.

His hand against my waist, began to slip lower, and I began to shake with anticipation. "Oh fuck... please James" I moaned as he hesitated at my panties. That was all the encouragement he needed, because at that second he was delving in, his fingers quickly finding my bundle of nerves... he pushed against it, as he pressed his erection roughly against my core again, and that was all it took. My orgasm crashed into me so forcibly, I screamed out, my whole body shaking, James groaned loud behind me, his movements becoming faster.

James ran his fingers over my slit, and back up to my clit... "Fuck Bella, your so wet, so fuckin hot..." I moaned at his words, my hand reaching up to run through his hair. James kissed my wrist lightly, his movements, becoming jerky. I quickly pulled out of his embrace, he protested lightly, but stopped when I turned towards him, and reached into his boxers. He was big... really big, my hand wasn't even close to fitting around him fully.

I stroked him wildly, our lips meeting fiercely, James grabbed my bottom and dragged me closer. He was close, I could feel him swelling further in my hands, I threw my leg over his hip, getting closer, the head of his erection pressing against my sensitive clit. we both moaned, and I knew I should be embarrassed, but it was all so hot, like first time teenagers in the back seat of a car. James grunted my name, and with a couple erratic thrusts, James came in my hand, his forehead leaning against my shoulder. We lay there for several minutes before he ripped his shirt off, and wiped my hand off with it. My face flushing again, James chuckled at me, and I excused myself, I so needed to remove my ruined panties.

I crawled back in the bed a couple minutes later, and curled up to James. I smiled into his now bare chest. This was a new beginning... I hoped!

**Ok Review, Let me know!**


	8. Ch8 Pick Me Up, Knock Me Down!

**Well my last chapter was done on my blackberry playbook... nowhere near as good as a normal keyboard... back on my laptop now... Thanks for all the wonderful reviews guys!**

**Steph M. Owns it all!**

Chapter 8: Pick Me Up, Knock Me Down!

Bella's POV

I woke up to my alarm blaring rediculously loud in my freakin ear, I groaned, slammed it shut, and leaned back to cuddle up to... nothing! I sat up quickly and looked around, James was gone, his spot cold.

I got out of bed feeling all kinds of weird. After searching the house in nothing but James' delisious smelling shirt, I come back empty freaking handed, not a note, or a smudge, or a crumb left behind for me... well except for my door being unlocked. I felt a pang of unease, he had said he had clothing here, so he would not need to go home, so why did he leave.

I tried not to read too much into it, knowing how I can sometimes get... my poor self esteem has major issues and the last thing I need is to bring that down on him. Maybe he wanted to go home and shower, or get an early start and didn't want to wake me. I made sure to keep these thoughts in mind as I showered and got ready for work.

I got to work just in the nick of time, and the minute I stepped off the elevator I froze. James was in his office, door open and sitting across from him was a red head, which I suspiciously suspected as none other than Vic - fucking - toria... oh this is gonna be one of those days.

I calmly took my seat, and began setting up James' planner for the day, once I was done I sat there unsure of whether or not I should go in there. I know how pissy he gets when I disturb him... but fuuuck part of me wanted to storm in there and stake my claim on my sexy as hell boss... the look on that bitches face would be priceless, she would most likely screech, and storm out... making a scene the whole way, or James would be so livid with me that I would ruin any and all chances of pursuing any type of relationship with him. So I parked my ass in my chair, and started reading the articles.

Ten minutes into my reading, Victoria let out a loud laugh that rubbed across my skin like sandpaper. "Oh James you are just too funny." She exclaimed in a high pitched voice. I clenched my hands and looked up. James had a flirty smile on his face, his eyes shining, and her fucking hand was on his arm... he didn't move away from her, in fact he held still letting her get her feel, and shy Bella took a back fucking stage to raging Bella. I stood up, grabbed his printout for todays schedule, and stormed into his office like I was on fire. I placed the paper in front of him... maybe a little harder than necessary and smiled a little too sweetly, and stormed out.

The office went dead silent, I looked up and at least five pairs of eyes were on me, two of those being the smirking red headed bitch and the glaring James. I grumbled quietly to myself, and went back to reading the stupid articles. I swear Victoria was in there for two freakin hours and James had waved three important phone calls because of it. I was floored did he not fire the psycho bitch. When she finally walked out of his office, she stared right at me, with the most evil grin I had ever seen, I swear smoke was coming out of the bitches nose, and horns forming at the top of her stupid head... and if you even say for one second that I was jealous... I would say you are on glue... me... jealous... never. Really.

Not even a full minute after the Devil herself walked out, James hollered for me to come into his office. I looked up and smiled as politely as I could and shook my head. "No can do Boss man..." I said in a falsely light tone. "I have an article to write for my column, maybe when I'm done... ok." I looked back down without waiting for a response. I heard a deep growl, but James did not pursue me anymore. He turned and stalked back to his office. I knew for sure half the stupid office had eyes on me, but I ignored them and I have to say it was the first time I was stuck on writing anything about how to keep things fresh, all I could think of was Victoria laughing at James and touching his arm, him letting her have the intimate contact. The anger was slowly turning to hurt, and I was having a hard time keeping it together... Like I said bad freaking self esteem and it took a lil beating.

I thought about the night before, and the early morning session I had with James, the feeling of being in his arms, and how it felt so exciting. So I wrote about how good it is to spice things up, with making out with your spouse, significant other. How prolonging the actual sex part of it, can make things feel so much better, how it makes things feel more exciting. By the time I was done with it, it was time for me to go home. Before I could do that, I had to buck up and bring it to James... ugh cue the freakin groan.

I stood up, got everything ready, making sure to get my purse and keys and throw it over my shoulder, before walking with my head held high to James' office. He was sitting at his desk, his tie gone, and his first two buttons undone, his jacket was on the chair, his sleeves rolled up and his face a mask of impatience. He looked hot... as freaking usual, but when he looked up at me, he glowered and I glowered right back.

"I'm done my article Mr. Masters and I'm heading out, unless there is anything else that needs to be done... office related." I added at the end so he didn't try to bring up anything else, at least I hope he didn't.

"Of course there is." He growled out, practically ripping the paper from my hands. "What the fuck was that today, storming into my office like you own the place." He asked, glancing at my article.

I smiled sweetly, and looked at him. "Oh wow I'm really sorry for that, my day started off a little rocky, my apologies Mr. Masters." My sweet girl act seemed to enrage him even more. "Or maybe it was the fact that the psychotic bitch who you fired, was in here feeling you up and you didn't give two shits about it." I snarled in a low voice, so no one else could hear me. James' eyes snapped up into mine, full of shock. "yep." I said popping the 'P' "It was definitely the latter." With that I turned around and walked away.

At that point I didn't care if he fired me, I was too mad to give a shit... what kind of man brings you to orgam hours before with his sexy fucking hands, then lets another woman feel him up... in front of the other... "Jerk." I mumbled out as I pushed the elevator button.

"What was that Miss Swan." Holy fucking De Ja Vu... could this day get any worse... but instead of getting all embarrased like last time I turned to him with one of my fiercest glares.

"I don't think I stuttered Mr. Masters... I said Jerk." His eyes widened like he expected me to deny deny deny... but like I said I was to mad to give a shit if he fired me. I turned around and headed for the stairs, deciding I so did not want to ride in the elevator with him. "I think I'll take the stairs." I mumbled, before opening the door, and starting to walk down. Because honestly 10 flights of stairs were better than facing him for another second right now. Could this day get any worse... I freaking hope not.

By the time I got home, I let out a loud fucking groan yup... the day could definitely get worse. There was Edward Fucking Cullen sitting on my front steps, with flowers and wine... are you kidding me. Make one mistake, one time and the man will never get over it.

Ok so yeah Edward was hot, I mean delicious. He had the most vibrant green eyes, and brown sex hair with copper highlights. He had a runners build, lean but still looked good. I wondered more than once why I couldn't love him the way he did me... but even after a night of sex... my one and only time I might add... I still did not feel anything towards him besides friendship.

I remember three years ago, I had run into him, first time scince the night it went too far, and he had said, "I'm still waiting for you Bella, and I will always be waiting for you until you decide to love me back." I told him I just didn't feel that way for him, but right now, staring at his ruffled appearance, looking sexy as hell, I wished I did feel that way, being with him would be easy. Too bad life was never meant to be easy.

I took a deep calming breath, and opened the door. As soon as Edward spotted me, he gave me a mega watt smile and stood from his seated position. "Hey Beautiful." He said as he pulled me into a hug, a hug I did not reciprocate. If I did that Edward would take it to heart, trust me I know from experience.

"Edward, I told you before, you cant just stop by here unannounced like this." I said bluntly, not opening my door yet, and I wouldn't until he left. Edward let out a breath and slumped.

"Well I called and left a message this morning, I told you I was coming over, so I figured since you didn't call back and decline it would be okay." I glared at him and he took a step back, most likely involuntary.

"What did I tell you, if I don't answer or call back, it's just like I'm saying no, not yes." Edward slumped more, putting his head down. I took a deep calming breath, and stepped foreward. "You have to stop this man, I mean you are on the edge of turning into a creeper Eddie. You need to let this go, I will never love you, your a friend, just a friend... you need to accept that."

Edward looked up, his eyes looking pained. "I know, I just wish... I just wish I was enough for you." At that moment I wanted to cry for him, I felt horrible, but I couldn't handle this anymore, he was damn near 26, he needed to find someone to love, who would love him in return, how he deserved it. "Goodbye Bella." He murmured, and the finality in that goodbye, gave me a start, it was a real goodbye... and all I could think was thank goddess.

I walked inside and threw my stuff on the counter, and walked over to my answering machine, '1' message blinked on it. I pushed the 'Play' button and listened. 'New Message recieved at 6:45 A.M.' "Hey Beautiful, It's me, I'm getting into town at six, figure maybe we can watch a movie, I'll bring some wine, if I don't hear back from you, I'm gonna take it as a yes... see you soon Love." 'End of message' I hit the 'Delete' button. Then everything fell into place.

Edward and his endearments, James probably woke up to the phone ringing, heard the message, and thought I was in a relationship... ohhh boy what a mess, I momentarily felt bad, until I thought about that skanky bitch touching James, and him allowing it. Then anger set in, he used her to purposely hurt me, instead of talking to me about it... instead of asking me if I was with someone else, even though I poured my heart out last night. What the hell was this high school, what a jerk, why was it the jerk I was attracted to, and not the caring sweet one.

I quickly ate, and had a soothing bath, I tried to relax, but there was just no way I had finally felt whole, after so many years of watching James, with no hope of reciprocation, then bam, wow he feels the same... and then not even a full day later something as simple as a message makes him act a fool. I drank a cup of sleepy time tea before bed, and fell asleep rather quickly.

I woke the next morning, feeling more refreshed than I thought would be possible considering the shit storm the day before, I woke up, and dressed up extra nice, a dress that hit just above the knees, a black and white pattern, the sleeves were capped and it was a empire waste. It made me feel good, and the material was so soft. I had gotten it from Alice as a gift for my birthday, and this was the first time I had worn it. I would have to thank her. I felt a pang in my chest at the thought of her and Jas... I would have to call them later, make up with them, I needed my friends back. I threw on some wedge sandals and a little makeup... I was gonna make James suffer.

I would waltz around his office and act like I had never been happier, let him think what he wants. It would serve him right, jumping to conclusions. So with a smile planted on my face, I walked into the office to start my day. I stopped short, and gaped at Victoria's empty desk, which was now holding her once more. All I could think was _'Am I being Demoted._' I was so happy with my new position, I enjoyd the sexy article. My smile melted off my face, and I walked shakily to my desk.

I figured, that I would know soon enough if I was no longer writing it, and if I was demoted, than maybe this job just wasn't for me anymore... maybe I needed to find something better. I kicked those unappealing thoughts out of my head, and sat at my desk, starting my daily routine. starting with James' schedule. Once finished I looked up, only to see that his door was firmly shut, I could hear his voice through the door, so I knew I had to wait, instead I started to read through the articles for the day. It helped erraticate all my other thoughts for the time being, and I didn't see James until just before noon. When he finally opened his door and walked out, I held up the schedule for him, and he grabbed it from my hands, without so much of a thank you.

"I want to see you in my office A.S.A.P. you too Victoria." He grumbled, then stomped away. I stood up, and stretched my back, then walked in behind red headed Devil. We both took a seat and I didn't even bother to look her way, I was too nervous and my heart was tripping all over itself... "You both will be writing for the same article, and I will be deciding whose will be better to put in. After a month, I will decide who will be the permanent writer." My mouth hung open, and I when I tried to speak, I am sure I resembled a fish. This was horrible, it was a slap in the face.

He had already given me the position, and now he was taking it back. I looked down and blinked frantically, trying to make the tears stay back. Victoria sighed loudly beside me. "Well just think about it this way Isabella, at least you'll still have your secretary duties." I just shook my head, unable to speak past the massive lump in my throat. Punishment... for Edward calling... Punishment for calling him out on being a jerk... but the worst part, the painful part, was the feeling of being not good enough. My inadequacy was shining through beside the evil beauty beside me.

The hands in my lap were shaking frantically, and I thought of what to do... should I just quit now, just walk out... what if I couldn't find a job. I would lose my home. I was heaving, trying to think of what to do. "You fired her." I squeaked out. "You fired her, and now your giving her my position." I continued. My eyes still downcast, too afraid of bursting into tears if I faced him.

"No Isabella, I am giving her an opportunity to get it back, and I do realize I fired her, but now she is rehired... its best if you get over it." I swallowed again, his voice was cold as ice, and I knew... I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt... it was time for Miss Isabella Swan to move on.

"Well then I guess good luck is in order." I said with as much enthusiasm as I could, looking over at Victoria. She looked surprised at my comment. I looked over at James, his cold stare looking back at me. "I will be sure to hand in my resignation letter by the end of the day." James cold eyes turned into surprised. I stood on shaky legs and walked out, the numbness in my body was slowly disappearing... I quickly sat and typed up my two weeks notice, I was so shaky that I kept making mistakes, my fingers fumbling over the keys. A sweet girl Angela, who always kept to herself, came over and took over my last couple sentences, without a word, her arm against mine, gave me some support without being blatant. I said a small 'thank you' and she nodded shyly, before walking away. I printed out two copies, one for myself, and one for James.

I then packed up my belongings, needing to excuse myself for the rest of the day, I just didn't have it in me to stay at that moment, my numbing body was starting to thaw, and that meant waterworks would soon be here. I walked to James office, and placed the letter in front of him. "Here you are Mr. Masters." I said, with as much confidence I could muster.

James reached out and grabbed my hand before I could pull away. "I didn't mean I wanted you to quit Bella." He murmured. "Damn it your the best employee here." He said, his voice almost sounding regretful. I pulled my hand away and stood straight.

"I'll train someone if you would like, but there is only two weeks to do it... and I sure hope you give a good review to anyone looking to hire me, because I am a damn good employee." I told him, through gritted teeth. James looked sad, but he nodded minutely. "I'm taking the rest of the day off... I need to clear my head." James nodded again and I walked out. Tears started to fall as soon as the elevator doors closed, and by the time I reached the ground floor, I was sobbing. People turned and stared, several were people I worked with... and rumors would fly now. I was walking to my vehicle when I heard someone call my name, I turned around and Alice was running towards me, her smile melted off her face as she took in mine.

"Oh Bella, what's wrong, what happened are you okay?" She questioned, pulling me into a tight hug. I sobbed into her shoulder, and told her about the last weeks events.

**Okay, I know alot in one chapter, I hope you guys likey likey! Review Please!**


	9. Ch9 The Other Side!

**Enjoy Guys! Short Chapter With James POV**

**Steph M. Owns it all!**

Chapter 9: The Other Side!

James POV

I woke up to a phone ringing, Bella was snuggled up to my side, her hair splayed over my chest, I could have stayed there all day... until I heard a mans voice on the answering machine, talking of movies, wine, and calling her Love... I felt sick to my stomach. I felt betrayed, and horrified.

I slowly moved away from the bed, and collected my clothing quickly, then left. I wanted to wake her up and fucking yell at her, but the thought of listening to her lie to me again, telling me that it had been years since she had taken anyone... since we had first met... I felt foolish for believing her.

My anger grew as I drove closer to home, and by the time I was showered, and ready for the day, I moved past anger, and hurt, and moved right into revenge... there was no way I would let a woman walk all over me repeatedly like Tanya did.

So I called Victoria back, since she had called me repeatedly since the day I fired her. "Hello Victoria, come to the office, and we will discuss you coming back to work." I told her as soon as she came on the line. She sighed in relief on the other end, and then said a thank you, and hung up.

She had tried many times to get into my pants, and I had always told her no... but maybe I would flirt a little, let Bella see what she could have had... if she wasn't such a lying bitch.

I got to my office early, and settled in, my whole body vibrating with the coming events. I knew this would go one of two ways, Bella would bow out, or make a scene, and either way, it would mean I wouldn't have to see her face for much longer. It was a challenge to flirt with Victoria with Bella so close, she came in with Bella so close, she looked upset and lost, the couple times I took a peek, but she didn't say or do anything, until I told a lame ass joke, and Victoria laughed a little too loudly and placed a hand on my arm. I smiled wide and didn't move away, even though I wanted to, but I could see Bella looking in the corner of my eye, and put on a good show for her.

When she stormed into my office, I almost expected her to fly off the handle, but her anger was fairly suttle and when she walked away Victoria gave a small giggle and said. "Aw lil Miss Swan thought maybe she had a chance if I went away didn't she." I gave her a very forced smile, and then moved the subject along... by the time she left, I had told her she could come back as a sub, for people away, or too busy, and I would give her another shot at her original article. I felt a twinge of regret as soon as I told her, but then the thought of Bella's boyfriend on the answering machine squashed that right quick.

When I sat her and Victoria down the next day, to explain the next months events, and how it was like a probation period, the look on Bella's face almost fucking broke me. I knew she was close to tears, and it was confirmed when she mentioned Victoria already being fired, and now I was taking her position away. I held my cold composure, and had expected her to nod and walk away.

... to say I was shocked at her quitting would be an understatement, I thought she would have hung on for the month, but she didn't, she looked destroyed, her whole body was shaking as she left my office... I even watched Angela, a sweet employee walk over, and silently help Bella with something, like she knew she needed it, even though Bella seemed to be holding together fairly well. I knew the minute she placed the letter on my desk, I made a massive fucking mistake, I felt like the biggest ass in history, and I had no one to blame but myself... I should have just came clean and asked her... too late now. I left shortly after Bella, and drove home, since I would have been useless to work anyway.

I spent the next couple of days in a blur, I had gone through ten interviews, all of them failing misserably, none of them coming close to Bella. By the time I stumbled home on a wednesday, I was exhausted, and I didn't know what was worse, the interviews, or the complete silence from Bella, unless she absolutely had to speak... she didn't even hand in my schedule anymore, she only read over the articles for me. I asked why she stopped the schedule, and she said that I needed to suck it up and learn before she leaves.

I had barely gotten out of the shower and thrown on some joggers when there was a loud knock at my door, one that was continuous. "I'm coming already." I yelled out, to stop them. When I opened the door, I had to take a step back from the extreme anger coming off of Emmett... "Woah what the fuck is up your ass?" I blurted, Emmett pushed past me, grabbed a beer from my fridge, and sat heavily on my couch.

"Sit down, we need to talk." He boomed out... shit I hadn't seen him this pissed since our senior year and I dabbled in a little ecstacy... I never touch any kind of drug after the ass kicking he gave me. So I sat. "So I talked to Rosie today." He started. "I haven't heard from her for a couple days, she tells me that she has been comforting a very distraught Bella." At the mention of Bella's name, my heart quickened. "I asked Rosie why... and holy fuck bro, you spent the night at her place, then you demote her... what the hell is going on in that head of yours." I sat back and scrubbed at my face.

"She has a boyfriend, he called when I was there, she was sleeping, he left a message calling her Love, and talking of wine and movies... I lost it, I didn't know what to..." Emmett put his hand up to stop me.

"Edward Cullen." He said staring at me. "Thats who called, I already know, it's Alice's cousin, and she is definitely not with him... the guy has been mooning over her for years, and doesn't want to give up... she shuts him down every time... so did she tell you she was with him... or let me guess you fucking assumed, right?"

I was speechless and horrified. "Are you sure?" I croaked out.

Emmett chuckled darkly, before swallowing the last of his beer. "Yup I sure am, too bad for you, Bella already found another job eh?" I looked up, feeling like I just got kicked in the junk... repeatedly. "Well I gotta go, just thought I'd come make you feel like shit... since you know you deserve it."

I watched Emmett walk out, and leaned back in my chair, almost unable to move...

Damage Control! Major Damage Control... I may not be able to keep her as an employee... but maybe I could have her even if only as a friend...

**Review!**


	10. Ch10 Suck It Up Buttercup!

**Stephenie owns it all! Hey peeps! Glad to be back writing another day!**

Chapter 10 : Suck It Up Buttercup!

Bella's POV

I may have lied about having a new job... to everybody. But seriously who wants to say, oh yeah with my kick associated resume no one wants to hire me, yaay.

So here I am on the weekend, blinds closed, and watching The Notebook for the hundredth freaking time in a single week. It had been just one week since my notice, which means one more week with the beautifully stupid bastard of a boss.

I was trying to avoid my friends and there sympathetic looks, oh poor Bella got her poor lil heart broken blah blah blah

Ok well im sure its not quite like that, but damn it I was feeling a little sorry for myself, so deal with it!

I had another week to deal with James and his sad puppy dog looks that let me know he regret it, or maybe that was wishful thinking on my part.

A knock on my door at noon brought me out of my Ryan Gosling coma. I wiped my nose on a half used kleenex before dropping to my table with the other couple dozen used kleeneex, and stumbled to the door. I knew I looked like shit, but didn't care about it so i threw the door opened to a wide eyed teenager. He had a large bouquet of mixed flowers. There were blues, reds, purples, pinks. The teen cleared his throat and said "Isabella Swan?" I nodded and he handed them to me before making a hasty retreat.

"Damn I must look bad!" I murmur as I close my door. The flowers were beautiful, and I had a feeling these beautiful flowers were from my almost exclusively boss... the jerky jerky. I carefully pulled the card from its protective spot and opened it. '_I'm sorry' _was the only thing written on it, wih James name underneath... ooh how heartfelt. NOT. "Jerk" I growled, before dropping the flowers in the garbage and stomping upstairs... falling into my bed and trying to fall asleep.

But all I could think about was those stupid Flowers... and the stupid note with those stupid flowers. Damn him. I practically ran down the stairs to pull the flowers from the trash, and carefully put them in a pretty vase. Me and my silly soft spot for flowers. How frustrating that I can't be as angry at him as I want to be.

I woke up to my screeching alarm on Monday, only 5 days left before I'm freaking jobless.. Ugh what a cluster fuck... I dressed into a nice dress, and wedge heel, a messy bun, and mascara with lip gloss.

I wanted to look good my last week. Walking by my kitchen counter I subconsciously leaned over and smelled my flowers... dammit.

I showed up to a very busy office, people were scattered all over, getting there columns finished up. Victoria the bitch was smirking at her computer, her too tight too short skirt had ridden up, and she acted like she didn't notice, her breasts falling out of the top of her shirt, and she was directing her body at James's office. I cut off my growl and walked to my desk. The new muti tasker was doing great, his name was Eric, and the googly eyes he was throwing James way, let me know he was most definitely gay... It gave me a bit of joy to know that the secretary was a man. But he caught on quickly, and I knew he was a good replacement.

James came out a few times, his normal bite your head off attitude was muffled by an air of sadness that wrapped around him like a cloak. I almost felt sorry for him.. almost. "Isabella can I speak with you please?" James asked quietly.

"Of course Mr. Masters." I smiled almost too chipper. My fake smile felt uncomfortable on my face. I stood stiffly and walked past James into his office, he closed the door with a soft *click* And walked around to his side of the desk. He cleared his throat and sat down, his leather chair creaking.

"Listen I know I messed up, I jumped to conclusions, I brought Victoria back to hurt you... I know I'm an idiot, a selfish, self absorbed idiot who should have spoken too you instead of thinking you were a liar. I should have known better, and I'm just so very sorry Bella." His eyes were pleading with mine to understand.

I liked this apology better than the I'm sorry on the card, but i had no clue what to say. "You hurt me." I murmured my fingers fidgeting. "You didn't even wake me up to ask, you left and flushed my job down the toilet. Why would you do that." I felt the traitorous tears try to come to the surface so I cut myself off, biting my lips harshly.

James leaned forward, his tortured eyes boring into mine. "I fucked up. I have no excuse for myself except to say I had a nasty ex who put me through the ringer... but I should have made sure, I should have talked to you about it." He pushed his hands through his now unbound, disheveled hair. "I'm an ass, a unruly ass who doesn't deserve you, but maybe I can convince you to stay, I will do whatever you want, I'll double your pay, I'll give you your own office, I'll do whatever you want, but please Bella this paper has been thriving this last 5 years because of you...

"I want you here, maybe in time you can trust me again, maybe you would let me back into your life more permanently, or maybe you won't, and I will be forever sorry that I did this, but please don't go to your other job... stay... please."

Well um duh.. Damn right I'll stay, but I was gonna make him Grovel just a pinch more. "I have conditions first, before I agree to anything." I said in a steadyish voice.

James eyes widened, surprised I considered I guess. "Anything you want." He practically shouted, before clearing his throat, his cheeks reddening... damn his cuteness.

"I want my column back, no probation period, it's mine and I want it back." I growled, surprising myself at how much the column meant to me, but i earned it! "And she has to go... As in Victoria, I think she is a snide, rude, self absorbed woman who wears too tight clothes, and I won't work here if she does. Ultimatums are not my thing, but you said anything, so I'm saying." James nodded with a small smile. "And I want the pay to stay the same, except Eric will be taking some of the load... so I guess it is a pay raise in a way." The last part I said in a smaller voice, feeling like I was taking advantage of him.

James leaned forward to catch my eyes. "You deserve it, your the best employee I've ever had... does that mean your staying?" He asked hesitantly, I could tell he was holding his breath, I nodded, and leaned over to shake his hand, James's breath wooshed out as he took it and he gave me a heart melting smile. "Thank you so much Bella" He whispered.

"Thank you... for apologizing, I appreciate it." I murmured slipping my hand from his. "How unprofessional would it be if I fired her for you." I questioned with a sparkle in my eyes. James barked out a laugh, caught off guard I'm sure, then shrugged his shoulders.

"If you really want to, be my guest." My eyes practically bugged out of my head, I didn't expect that. I bit my lip contemplating, then shook my head.

"As much as I would love to see her face, I can't, I'm too damn shy." I shook my head, and smiled shyly. "Well I should go back to work, my column will be ready by the end of the day." I smiled happily, no longer jobless girl. Woot woot.

James stood and walked around the desk, opening the door for me. "Thank you for giving me a chance, even if it's just for work." He breathed against my ear, the warmth from his hand on my back seeping into my shirt, and my skin. I shivered and blushed, before scurrying away back to my desk. "Victoria my office... now." James growled. The smile she had on her face melted away and I had to look away to stop the giggle lodged in my throat.

It took a mere 5 minutes for Victoria to storm out of James office, her fists clenched and mumbling profanities under her breath, and a minute later she was gone, out of my life... hopefully for good. I heard one person whoop, more clapped, others openly laughed. Until James poked his head out telling everyone to get back to work.

I was late finishing up my column, nearly 7 when I dropped it on a tired looking James desk. His hair was a mess, tie loosened, sleeves rolled up. Head leaned against his head rest on his chair. He had several days growth of a beard on his face. I realized he was sleeping.

I walked around his desk quietly, and ran my fingers through his hair. "James, wake up." He moaned quietly, turning his head towards me. "You need to wake up, or your neck is going to be crazy sore in the morning." James finally opened his eyes, colliding with mine. He reached out and grabbed my wrist holding my hand to his hair.

"That feels good." He murmured sleepily. I gasped at the sizzling heat. Then scratched his scalp softly, before pulling away. He then sat up and stretched. "I'm going to take your word on this today, and print without reading." He yawned, then scratched at his cheek.

"Sure, I proof read it anyway, it should be fine. Want me to set it up for printers before I go?" I asked shyly.

"No no I've got it." He assured me before finding the pdf version and preparing it. I stood there watching the steps he took.

"One day you can make me partner." I joked.

James looked up at me with a serene smile. "One day!" He said, with a smile. I stopped breathing at the sincerity in his voice and eyes. Then said a hasty goodbye and beat feet before I melted all over his office floor... the beautiful bastard.

**I hope you enjoyed! Review please! **


	11. Ch11On The Mend!

**Stephenie Meyer owns the characters! But the plot is mine... Mwah ha ha ha ha! :D**

Ch. 11. On TheMend!

**Bella's POV!**

I was laying in bed, Sunday morning, enjoying the chirping birds outside, the short silky night gown felt like heaven against my skin, the smile on my face would have cracked the most stubborn frown. I had no idea why I was feeling so cheerful today... I just was, everything seemed to be going well.

Eric was a great secretary, and my hot steamy columns left me breathless at the end of the day, because no matter how much I tried not to, I imagined it being James and myself... and James' eyes would heat as he read them, searching me out, like he was imagining us too. My blush would appear and I would duck my head, for two reasons, one is the obvious I'm extremely shy, the other being I was scared to go there again, I knew he was sorry, and I can see the regret of what could have been in his sexy eyes, but I still fear that he might hurt me.

Fear was an irrational thing, and I had decided laying in my bed, with my wide smile, I would conquer this fear, Monday morning. I would have all day to plan and groom, and make sure to stay extra late in the office.

So I did the one thing I may regret, but knew I needed... I called Alice.

"Oh Bella I'm so excited and happy that you decided to forgive him, I know he messed up bad, but you will be an amazing couple."

I raised a single eyebrow at her confidence. "And how do you know for sure?" I questioned with a hidden giggle.

"Oh I just do." She grinned serenely, "And I'm telling you, you should never bet against me." She finished with a frustrated huff.

"She's telling the truth" Yelled Jasper. "My pixie is always right." He was downstairs flipping through channels, while Alice and I were in my room me sitting on my bed, her ripping apart my closet growling and hissing at my clothing.

"Alright then, no gambling with you." I laughed, causing Alice to send a glare over her shoulder.

Sunday was a flurry of activity with Alice around, but at I couldn't complain, because I was feeling incredibly prepared and excited for the day to come.

My alarm went off with a loud obnoxious beep, I groaned and sat up, slapping the offensive thing to shut it up.

I quickly showered and dried off, feeling all kinds of excited and nervous, but no thoughts of backing out were present I was definitely ready. I made it to the office with minutes to spare, and as the elevator dinged at my floor, I took a deep breath and blew it out, then walked out. My hair was curled and flowing down my back, my make up suttle, with glossed lips, I was wearing a black dress that hit a little lower than mid thigh, and there was a v neck, with definite cleavage, especially with the push up bra I was wearing, and the sleeves were 3 inches wide, the dress was a solid dark purple. My shoes were simple black balet flats, no nylons, my legs were bare.

I heard someone break into a deep coughing fit, and when I looked around, I spotted James through the Window in his office, his hand in a loose fist in front of his mouth, his coffee in his other hand, his shoulders shaking from the hacking cough, and oh his eyes were glued to my body,wandering up and down, like he couldn't stop himself.

A smile spread across my face, and with a inner fist pump, I walked right in to his office, behind his desk, and started to forcefully slap him on the back.

Once his coughing subsided, I rubbed his back instead of slapping it. "Are you alright, Mr. Masters?" I asked leaning forward putting my other hand on his desk so I could see his face, and of course slyly put the top of my breasts on display, not obscenely but enough to entice.

James' eyes immediately zoned into the Valley between, and licked his delicious lips before jerking back up to my eyes, his cheeks turning scarlet. I lifted an eyebrow questioningly, and could tell he was searching his brain for the question he had already forgotten.

"Oh.. Uh... Yeah, the coffee went down the wrong tube..." He trailed off clearing his throat.

I pulled my hand back, and walked out without a backwards glance and the groan behind me, let me know he seen the 4 inch slit at the back of my dress, hiding a shit eating grin behind a straight face, I turned and sat at my desk, and started going over the columns already on my desk, I could feel my hands shaking, I had never been this bold before, and it was hard not to wilt and hide, but dammit I wanted to make him squirm before giving him my self, even though he already had me, unbeknownst to him.

The day dragged on, and I had to really work to slow down on my column, or I would have been done early, the thing is, I knew exactly what was going to be my article today, office romance. And I was going to sit down and ask him to go over it, because I wasn't quite sure if it was any good. *grin* now let's hope I could do it.

James POV

I was in hell, actual hell. My erection was so hard, I couldn't even adjust it. I had to cancel 3 appointments because I could not stand up without it being obscenely obvious. Bella was sitting at her desk, taking for fucking ever, it was past 7:30 and more than anything I needed to relieve myself, to the images of Bella, and her naughty secretary outfit.

Looking up, the last employee, other than Bella, was leaving by the elevator. Not two minutes later, Bella sauntered into my office, a piece of paper in her hands, and a bright blush on her face, holy hell what was she doing to me. "Can you go over this for me please, I don't know if it'll work." She mumbled, before handing over the paper and sitting down on the other side of my desk.

Jesus she wanted me to read it in front of her, when all I could think of is turning all these fantasies into reality with her. I cleared my throat and mumbled "of course." Before looking down.

**Role play can be a great way to heat up your boring sex life, for example, an office romance. **

I cleared my throat, before adjusting my too tight collar.

**So many of us have computer desks at home, or you could be really naughty and go to your man's work place, play naughty secretary, have your other half sit in the chair while you sneak beneath, and take him in... Or drop a pen with a short skirt on...**

I could feel my cock twitch, as I thought of Bella's short tight dress rising as she bent to pick up a pen.

I couldn't read anymore, or I would burst through my pants. So instead, I acted like I was reading, instead I just did a quick scan, trying not to groan as the words commando and tongue jumped out at me.

I looked up, to see Bella looking back at me her blush had deepened and I chanced a look to see how far it went, it went far, so far I would have to remove her dress to see. She cleared her throat, and my eyes shot back up. My own face reddening.

"It's fine... A perfect column as always." I mumbled, pulling at my collar again, only this time, I pulled so hard a button popped off and pinged across the room. Bella giggled at that, she actually giggled, the sound was like a soft caress against my skin.

"You are so sexy when your flustered." She said, her voice damn near a purr, as she stood up and came around. I was beyond speechless, until she pulled my chair out, and straddled my legs... "I'm going to give you something important." She murmured against my lips. "But you have to promise to take care of it." Her kiss feather light. I nodded, I would do anything she asked. Without another word, she grabbed one of my hands that were gripping her waist, and placed it over her chest, where her heart beat wildly underneath. "Promise you'll take care of it James, and promise you'll talk to me."

My throat convulsed, as I realized she was giving me another chance, I swallowed to clear it than spoke only a few words. "I promise." Before getting choked up, something I hadn't done in a long time.

Then she was kissing me, and I was kissing back, teeth clashing, tongues entwined, holding each other tightly, I would never walk away again no matter what.

"Would you like to come over?" She asked against me, our breathing heavy, fast, and mingling. "We have unfinished business." I nodded mutely, and knew I was the luckiest man ever, and also knew I might not make it to her house.

I slapped my hand against the paper she brought in. "How would you feel about a little foreplay?" I questioned, a little unsure, until Bella's eyes heated, and a grin spread over her swollen kissed mouth. Oh fuck, was I in trouble.

**Hope you like it, I'm sorry I take so long, life gets busy, but I promise every story will be finished... Eventually! Lol I hope you enjoy!**


	12. Ch12 Falling!

**Okay Guys its been brought to my attention that I made a teeny tiny, eeny weeny, little mistake! I may have turned Bella back into a...uh... Virgin! See just tiny... Really... It's possible... Right... RIGHT! Uhhh really sorry about that... That's what happens when I stay away from my story for so long, I spent an hour skimming through it for this exact reason! LOL (obviously not good enough lol) so thanks a bunch mwhite07! I've. Tweaked it a smidgen so she is just really rusty lol! **

**I'm BACK! woo hoo! lol**

**LEMONS LEMON AND MORE LEMONS... DON'T LIKE IT... UHHHHH LOOK AWAY?**

**Stephenie Meier owns the characters... I own the steamy story! Enjoy!**

**LAST CHAPTER**

_My throat convulsed, as I realized she was giving me another chance, I swallowed to clear it than spoke only a few words. "I promise." Before getting choked up, something I hadn't done in a long time._

_Then she was kissing me, and I was kissing back, teeth clashing, tongues entwined, holding each other tightly, I would never walk away again no matter what._

_"Would you like to come over?" She asked against me, our breathing heavy, fast, and mingling. "We have unfinished business." I nodded mutely, and knew I was the luckiest man ever, and also knew I might not make it to her house._

_I slapped my hand against the paper she brought in. "How would you feel about a little foreplay?" I questioned, a little unsure, until Bella's eyes heated, and a grin spread over her swollen kissed mouth. Oh fuck, was I in trouble._

Ch. 12 Falling!

**Bella's POV**

My dress fell to the floor, the instant I nodded. James wasted no time removing it. Beneath it my black lingerie felt non exsistent. James groaned deep in his throat, taking me in.

"I am so lucky to have such a forgiving woman in my life." He murmured against my swollen lips, nipping and sucking at them. I wrapped my arms around his neck and deepend the kiss. Gasping out when the back of my thighs and ass hit the top of his cold desk, my nerves spiked.

"I dont want to role play." I told him convulsively, as he leaned into me, freezing when he heard my words. "I want you so bad James... but..." I trailed off, feeling nervous and embarrased. "The thing is, I've only had sex once... In high school." I mumbled against the warm skin of his neck. "I want a bed." James slowly moved back, his breath coming out quickly.

"Your serious..." He stared at me, disbelief in his eyes. I nodded slowly. Then a massive grin broke over his face, before kissing me deeply again. "Thats years Bella... I...I'm the luckiest man in the entire world, and I swear to you Bella, I will not let you down." He ran a single finger down my jaw and neck, then let me go and picked up my dress. He held it out to help me into it, touching every bit of my bare skin that he could, before covering it.

I felt a little embarrassed, I had this big plan to seduce him and of course chickened out. My face heated. "I'm sorry." I murmured, as he picked up his jacket.

His eyebrows scrunched in confusion. "What for Beautiful." He looked truly perplexed.

"For getting you all hot and heavy, then stopping." I said, leaning closer to him, unable to stay away. James pulled me closer, wraping his strong arms around me.

"Don't apologize, never apologize. Im not mad, upset, or dissapointed. I won't pressure you into anything... as a matter of fact." He growled the last part, leaning over to rumble against my ear. "There will be no sex until ive got you so hot and wet, that your begging me to make love to your sweet body." I gasped out as he bit lightly at my earlobe and pressed a muscled thigh between my legs.

I couldn't speak as i could feel myself growing impossibly more wet. "I don't think that will take me long." I groaned as I unconsiously rubbed myself more forcefully against him. James let out a loud gruff laugh, that did nothing to cool the embers inside of me. He pulled away and grabbed my hand, I wobbled from the loss between my legs, and James steadied me with an arm around my shoulder.

"Lets get out of here Bella." He said, kissing my hairline. I nodded and we walked out.

"My place or yours." I asked, before jumping into my own vehicle.

"Yours... it's closer." He murmured, pulling me forward and kissing me quickly. I jumped in and started to drive home as quickly as I could, while still being safe.

James was out of his vehicle and at mine, before I even had the engine shut off. He was opening my door and pulling me out, I barely had enough time to grab my purse and keys. We walked to my door in quick strides, and my hands were shaking so bad from nerves and arrousal that he had to take over for me.

As soon as my front door was closed and locked, James pulled me to him, lifting my ass so I could wrap my legs around him, and then he was running up my stairs, full tilt. I squealed and wrapped my arms tightly around his neck, making him laugh. As soon as we got to my room, James slowed down, his movements, his lips, his grip. He began placing soft kisses along my neck, as he lay me down on the bed, with himself over top of me... since I had a death grip around his waste, with my own legs.

"Your so beautiful Bella." He murmured into my neck, then as if unable to stop himself, he nipped at it causing a sharp pain to streak through me, I gasped and then moaned loudly when the pain turned into something dark and pleasurable, traveling to my sensitive, throbbing center. James leaned back to look at my face, and reactions... and when he no doubt seen the lust in my eyes, he groaned and thrust his very prominent covered errection into my barely covered core. "My very own dream woman right in front of me." He murmured, kissing me again.

I lifted my hips up to rub against him more forcefully, needing more... so much more. "Ah ah ah my Beautiful Bella, not yet." With that he pulled away, and removed his shirt, which had been sticking to his sweaty skin. Then he reached down and pulled my dress up and over my head. Taking in my barely there lingerie like he hadn't already seen it earlier. "Fuck I can't believe how lucky I am." He murmured, moving down my body, he dipped his tongue inside my belly button, and i would have been grossed out, if it hadn't felt so good.

For the next... who knows how long... James worshipped my body, without touching any spots that were covered, nibbling and kissing my feet, ankles, legs, stomach, arms, after he touched every single spot of uncovered skin with his teeth, hands, and tongue, he flipped me over and once again went to work, sensitising every part of my skin.

Kissing and nibbling the back of my neck, I couldn't help but raise my ass in the air, hoping for friction, and thankfully, blessedly, I found James' erection. The moan that left both of our throats was simultaneous. James bit the back of my neck and rubbed against me at the same time, and I felt myself fall over the edge I hadn't realized I was close to. I never knew I could like a little bit of pain with my pleasure, but uncontrolable movements as my orgasm ripped through me, told me that i absolutely did.

"Fuck Baby, your so sexy." James whispered in my ear, lifting himself, and turning me. "I need to taste you so bad." He murmured, moving down once again. I froze, not quite understanding at first, but then, before I could truly comprehend what he was about to do, James spread my compliant legs, and ran his hot moist tongue over my lace covered core. The sound that tore out of my mouth at that first moment, didn't sound like me. I had never felt anything so incredible... that is until he moved the lace panties to one side, and ran his tonge up my slit and over my clit in one single motion. I could feel on the verge of another orgasm once again, my tongue thick in my mouth I tried to beg for more, but it came out a jumbled mess. Then he sucked my clit into his mouth, and tugged with his teeth.

I screamed loud... really loud... so loud in fact, that I could hear the reverberation come back to me as my orgasm caused me to spasm and twitch. "Please James." I moaned. Every orgasm he gave me, only made me want him inside me more. "I want you so... so bad." I said shaking. "I need to feel you." I whispered, feeling suddenly fragile and needy. James pulled my panties off and his pants and boxers in seconds, then growling, he grabbed his pants again, and at first i didn't understand why, until a small square foil package was pulled out. I shook my head. "Im on birth control, its fine." James looked up into my eyes, and looked about to say something else, but before he could I reached out. "Please James."

With that, he crawled above me once more, and made quick work of my lacy bra, his mouth latched onto a nipple, as his erection rubbed over my clit in a rythm that drove me mad. I pulled him up to my lips, and raised my hips. "Please don't make me beg." I whispered against the moist skin of his mouth.

"Never baby... never." And then he was there, pushing slowly inside of me, his arms wrapped tightly around me, holding me hostage in the most blissful way possible. After entering me slowly at first, the stretching felt strange, but nothing hurt or uncomfortable... until he reached a little farther, then he thrust in quickly, making me gasp out. It only hurt for a second, maybe two, before it left me with a need so fierce I thought I might choke on it. Edward had not been anywhere near this size, and it had been so long since the one time I was with him. Frantically I started to move my hips, needing so much more... James clued in in seconds, and started to thrust slowly, pulling almost all the way out, then all the way in! It was almost maddening, I needed more, and when I pulled back to tell him as much... I noticed a slight amusment in his eyes.

"Don't tease me James, I need more, please I'm burning up."

"Fuck Baby, I can't deny you anything." He groaned, the amusment gone to show enough passion to make me drown, then he was moving... the pace so fast I had to grip his back, my nails digging into his skin. James unwound his arms from me, and placed one on the bed beside me, the other on my cheek, as he pulled me into a hot, sweaty kiss. Then he moved it down slowly, stopping to pinch a tight nipple, causing me to arch, then his thumb moved over my clit, rubbing and pushing at it fiercly as he started to slam into me.

I arched up and felt his lips on my neck, then his teeth scraping my skin, and I exploded once more, my body convulsing as my mouth opens and lets out jerky moans, James thrust once more, and shoved into me more and harder, before he stopped, and I can feel him jerking inside me, as he pants and groans into my hair. Goddess it felt so good, so hot.

I clung to James, not wanting him to move, needing him inside me. It was as if he knew, without pulling out of me, James rolls over, so im on top of him. We lay there panting and clinging to each other for awhile, until the sweat started to make me shiver. James slipped out of me, and we both groaned.

"I need a shower." I murmured flushing. James laughed lightly and helped me up.

"Mmm me too, lets conserve water." I giggled and grabbed his hand, and pulled him to the shower with me.

The next week went by blissfully well. If it wasn't for the windows in his office, facing the employees, we would have had many more innapropriate moments. As it was, James stayed over... every night. I had yet to go to his place, but wasn't worried about it, I knew i'd get there eventually.

It wasn't until the second week after our new start, that things started... happening. James decided to stay at his own home the night before, because he had a busy day. I was dissapointed, but didn't want to show it, because we were in a new relationship, and things were moving very quickly.

So instead I put on my big girl panties and slept alone... miserably. I woke up several times cold, reaching out for James, then remembering he wasn't there, I grumbled at myself and fell back to a restless sleep. I woke up before my alarm clock the next morning, and dragged myself out of bed, making sure to cover my dark circles with cover up, the last thing I wanted was for James to know how bad I slept without him there. "Co-dependent much." I scold myself in the mirror. Caring about and wanting someone around is one thing... but I absolutely did not want to depend on him.

So with a heavy confused heart, I got ready, and went to work. I got there on time, and already the office was filling up. Eric was typing away. He was great at his job. James was in his office, looking dishevelled. His tie was loosened, his hair was a mess. I frowned and opened the door to his office, walking in, I closed it lightly behind me. "Are you okay." I asked timidly.

James jumped and looked up startled. "Jesus Bella, I didn't even hear you come in." He murmured, rubbing his face. "Yeah I'm fine, just had a stressful night."

"Whats wrong." I asked walking across the room, and stood in front of his desk.

James glowered at me, and shook his head. "Nothing that concerns you." He stated. It wasn't rude or mean... just matter of factly... but it still hurt.

Shoving the hurt down, so he couldn't see how it affected me, I nodded slowly, and turned to walk away. "Well let me know if there is anything I can do." I mumbled, before opening the door, and walking out. _one step forward, two steps back_ I think bitterly. But now was not the time, I pushed my negative thoughts to the back of my mind, and got to work.

I left before anyone else that day, since I finished up my column in almost half the time and still it was damn good. James hadn't said much, when I mentioned I was finished and leaving, causing a strange ache in my stomach.

I had hopes that he would come over later, and everything would be fine, but as the minutes and then hours ticked my, I was starting to feel unsure. Then when midnight rolled around, I gave up, dragging my feet up the stairs like a scorned child. I text James a quick goodnight... hoping he would text back... but I got nothing.

Thankfully, from the lack of sleep the night before, I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow. The next morning I got ready quickly and left, hoping to get there and talk to James. But when I got there, he wasn't in... in fact he called several hours later, and told Eric he wouldn't be in, and to change all his meeting to next week.

I was done waiting, I picked up my cell phone and called him. "Hello." He said gruffly, his voice sounded strained.

"Hey are you okay?" I asked yet again, hoping he would finally confide in me.

"Jesus Bella, I told you it's nothing that concerns you." He growled out. "Just leave me alone... please."

"Of course it concerns me." I said in a small voice. It was so hard speaking up sometimes. "When something affects you, it affects me... it's called being in a relationship." I said it all quickly, before my throat closed up.

James huffed out a breath. "I get that, I really do... and maybe I will talk to you about it eventually, but right now, I'm not ready... you and me, we are in a new relationship Bella, what I'm dealing with right now... we haven't been together long enough for this conversation... okay?!" I nodded, even though he couldn't see me, but I couldn't speak with the massive lump in the way.

Trying desperately to clear it, I whispered out an "okay" hoping he didn't hear the tremble in my voice. "I'm sorry." I said a little louder, composing myself. "I'll talk to you later... whatever is happening I... I hope you have someone to talk to." I hung up after that, before I started to sob. It took me several precious minutes to collect myself, before I could continue working. The rest of the week went the same. No James, a depressed me, and a very quiet office. I promptly took over James' duties, since I knew everything about it. It felt a little awkward, but I sucked it up.

By friday, I was utterly exhausted, having done two jobs, and as I crawled onto my couch, because my bed was too far, I decided this weekend was definitely going to be my spa weekend getaway, with muscled men massaging me, and skilled women pampering me. Texting Alice with bleary eyes, I passed out before I could get a response.

**Hmm uh oh whats happening with James!? Review please!**


	13. Ch13 Scared!

**Stephenie owns it all!**

**I apologize for my last chapters mess up! lol **

Ch.13 Scared!

**James' POV**

I was sitting across from my doctor, completely speechless. I could see his lips moving, but the words sounded like they were muffled. I put my hand up to stop him. "Wait wait... this can't be right, it's just a little pain, how could this be possible?" I asked, shaking my head, trying to clear it.

Dr. Shepard stared at me with sympathy in his eyes. "We need to start therapy as soon as possible... we can't wait long, this can spread quick. I'm just glad we caught it this early." I'd had chest pains for a week prior and made an appointment... I'd expected my doctor to tell me it was anxiety, or lack of sleep, anything but this.

"But I don't smoke." I blurted out, feeling out of sorts.

"No and that does lessen the chances of lung cancer... but... but it still happens. We will set up chemotherapy for you, before we do the surgery, to shrink it down." He stopped and shuffled some papers on his desk, before looking back up. "This wont be pleasant James, side effects can be quite... extreme. You may want to take measures to store your sperm..."

I threw my hand up again. "No this is too much." I snarled, pushing my chair back. "I cant think about this right now." My brain hurt, and to my utter horror, I could feel my eyes start to water.

Dr. Shepard stood too. "James, you need to hear this, things will progress quickly, so we need to get on this, Your first chemo treatment will be the day after tomorrow, which means you need to make arrangement for your sperm, if you plan to be a father." I cringed and turned away, facing the big window, that overlook a very large parking lot.

"If you were anyone else, I'd punch you for that." I chuckled, though I felt no humor.

Dr. Shepard chuckled behind me. "I admit, that may have been harsh, but I need you to see reason." I nodded my head, feeling like the whole entire world was sitting directly on my shoulders. "Is there anyone you can call, and talk to?" He questioned quietly.

The first thing to pop into my head was Bella's beautiful face... but there was no way I could confide in her, no way I would want her to see me fall apart and lose my hair, and throw up... I couldn't do it. "Emmett." I finally said. "I'll call him if I feel like I can't do it on my own." Dr. Shepard looked like he wanted to disagree but I shook my head, I didn't want to hear it... and I could damn well do it on my own.

–-

The next two days were a complete blur of doctors, counselors, and a very awkward masturbation session, to store my sperm. With the stress, it was not easy, or pleasant... but I did want to have a chance at being a father dammit.

Bella tried talking to me at work the morning of my first chemo day. I had come in to try to set everything up, in case I would not be up to coming into work.

I knew I hurt her feelings when I told her it was nothing that concerned her... but I just couldn't tell her.

I woke up the next morning in pain... my muscles, my bones, my head... sweat was pouring off of me, and my stomach was revolting... at first I didn't know what was wrong, then it came back to me, _Chemotherapy._ Groaning I looked over at the time, and then did a double take... I had slept in, through my alarm, which probably gave up an hour before. Moving was intolerable, but I had to use the washroom, and I needed to grab my cell phone from my dresser.

It took almost everything I had to get to the bathroom, and by the time I got back to my bed, I knew there would definitely be no work for me. Slowly lifting my cell phone, I made the call to Eric my secretary, and hoped Bella could take on my roll and her own.

Not long after I hung up with Eric, Bella was calling... and I almost ignored it, but I knew I had to say something eventually, and I knew my best option, was to push her away, so she wouldn't worry... I hope.

I almost broke, when she said it concerned her because of our relationship... but it was too new, there was just no way I could do that to her. So with a gruff voice and a heavy heart, I pulled my ass hole attitude and pushed her away.

I was supposed to do daily treatment, and had been so confident about being able to take care of myself, that I almost skipped the appointment... but my health was more important than my pride. So I picked up my phone and made a call. "Bro, I need you." I croaked.

Emmett was pale, sitting beside me, and watching me with pity, a tube in my arm, a machine pumping poison inside me. "Don't look at me like that." I demanded weakly. "I need support not pity... I'm gonna beat this, because I refuse to die." I stated... because it was the truth, I had absolutely no doubt that I would get through this.

"Does Bella know?" He finally questioned, running a shaky hand through his short hair. I shook my head slowly. "Dammit James, she needs to know."

"No way." I snarled. "We've barely started this relationship, there is no way I'm putting this on her shoulders."

"How do you think she's gonna feel... being left out?" He questioned quietly. "When it finally comes out, and she is sitting there stunned and hurt." Emmett's eyes pierced my own. "Because she wont see it as you protecting her... she'll see it as you not trusting her."

He was right... and I was a fucking idiot.

Emmett, to my complete horror, helped me into, and out of my shower. I was beyond embarrassed, but he laughed it off, and told me it was no different than the community showers in high school... we both knew it was, but I appreciated it.

After changing into comfy clothing that would be soft against my skin, Emmett helped me limp to my bed... and pulled out a small white rolled up paper... it took me a minute to comprehend what I was staring at, and when I did, I barked out a laugh. "A joint?" I questioned. "Where'd you get that?"

"I may have got it from an old stash that was stored in the back of my freezer." I should have known. "Now stop stalling, you can call Bella, then you can get high, hopefully it'll help with the nausea."

Taking a deep breath, I dialed her number. "Hey are you okay?" Came her soft voice, and I almost melted, even after I treated her like shit last time I talked to her, she still worried about me.

"Not really..." I murmured taking a deep breath. "I'm sick Bella, and even though I know I will get through this... I... it's gonna be tough."

Bella insisted on coming over, even though I told her I didn't want her to see me like this... she refused to listen, stating: 'If I cant handle you like this, than I don't deserve you at all' I was both stunned and thrilled by her declaration... but I was still not thrilled with her seeing me weak.

**Bella's POV**

I had yet to be at James' home, but I found it easily enough, after typing the address into the GPS on my phone. It was a large light blue house, with a beautiful garden in the front, it was dark out, but I had a feeling the back yard was incredible. There was a wrap around porch, with patio furniture... one being a 2 seated patio swing, that was currently being used by a distraught looking Emmett.

"Hey." I said quietly, putting a tentative hand on his shoulder. He nodded and stood up.

"Listen I've gotta go, but uh... don't baby him, he'll hate it... and..."

"Hey don't worry so much... you need to remember, I've known James for years... I can take anything he can dish." Emmett let out a chuckle and left, without saying a word.

The house was in shadows, and the only light was one from upstairs, so I decided I could check it out later, the only thing I wanted right now, was James.

The first thing I noticed when I hit the top of the stairs was the smell... and then I walked into the lighted room. It was all dark furniture, James was laying on top of his covers which were a deep dark red... but what had my complete attention, was the smile on James' face, as he looked over at me... he was high as a kite.

**AH HA there ya go! I hope you enjoy! I'm gonna update Amnesia next, and then come back to this one! Review Please! I love to read what you all have to say! :D **


	14. Ch14 Acceptance!

**Stephenie Meier Owns it all!**

**Hey Everyone, just a heads up that I plan to wrap this up in the next couple chapters, moving on to an apocalyptic type story! Any input on character match ups? **

**Thanks for sticking with me, I know it's taken me awhile! :D **

Ch.14 Acceptance!

**Bella's POV**

I walked towards James, his grin stayed on his face, along with a glassy eyed look. "Bellaaaaaa." He purred out, reaching a hand out. "Come lay with me."

I shook my head and grinned. "You are stoned." I stated matter of factly.

James nodded slowly. "Yep I am, and it feels... good." I pulled my socks and pants off, leaving me in my t-shirt, it hit mid thigh. "Your so Beautiful." He murmured, eying my bared legs. I blushed and climbed under the covers he was laying on. He rolled fully towards me, and blinked slowly. "I'm sleepy Bella, and I'm sore, and I don't know if I can do this without you... but I know this is too much for you, since we are just started..."

"No." I interrupted him, louder than I meant to. "It's not too much James, and I've been with you, on way or another for years. I want to be here, I want to help you, and I wont take no for an answer." I said firmly, waiting for James to deny me... but he didn't.

"I would love to disagree, but the truth is, I don't think I'll have the strength."

James fell asleep quickly after that, and I did too.

I woke up to the bed shaking, and realized it was James. He was sweating and shivering at the same time, his skin was pallid, and his eyes were full of pain. "S-sorry, I-I didn't... didn't mean to wake you." He chattered out.

I got up and ran a warm bath in James's massive jacuzzi bathtub. Then slowly helped him into it. He kept apologizing for needing help. "James stop, don't apologize, please. I don't mind, I'm here to help... it- it's okay to lean on me." I stuttered out. James took my word for it, and stopped apologizing. I stripped down and sat behind him in the bath, holding and washing his body.

It was hard, washing and helping him, and trying not to get aroused and start groping. _He's sick, get your head straight._

It was a rough day, and Emmett came by to take James to his next treatment.

The next two weeks were brutal, they adjusted his treatment so it wasn't as bad, but it still zapped his energy. I worked during the day, and helped James at night. At first he was very embarrassed, but he soon realized that I was here, I was fine, and I would not leave him.

I didn't expect the beginning of our relationship to be full of vomit and marijuana... but I would rather this, than nothing at all.

James went in, and had another scan of his lungs, and the Doctor said he was ready for surgery. Which I figured would be a relief. But James was beyond nervous, and cranky. It took me most the day to finally break him, and make him talk.

"I'm scared okay." He finally bellowed out, we were standing in his spacious kitchen, and I was making him some broccoli soup. "What if I get this surgery, and it comes back, or spreads." He sat down on one of the stools at the breakfast counter.

"Oh James." I sighed out, walking over and wrapping my arms around his neck. "Maybe it will come back, maybe you wont make it to next year." I choked out the last part, hoping that would not be the case. "But you have to make the most of what you have, and you are doing everything you can, to further your chances of survival... and they caught it early."

James pulled back from me, looking stunned from my words. "I didn't expect you to be so blunt." He stated, looking awed. "Thank you, for not sugar coating this for me!" I kissed him sweetly on the lips, and went back to the soup.

We spent the rest of the day relaxing, I was very worried about his surgery, which would be the next morning, but I did my best to put on my brave face. That night we held each other in bed, kissing and touching each other... but he was tired and soon fell asleep, after apologizing, I knew he was embarrassed about not being able to function properly... but there was no reason for it, being near him was enough for me.

The surgery seemed to take forever, and when I asked a nurse, she told me I was not family, so she could not give me any information. "Is that a joke." I cried out. "He came with me, I'm his girlfriend." The nurse scowled disaprovingly.

"I'm sorry Ma'am but that is protocol, you will have to wait." Her reply was snotty.

I was about to scream my outrage, but before I could, someone touched my shoulder. I spun around, and a blonde woman with bright blue eyes was smiling gently at me. "It's okay sweetie, I've got this." With that she turned toward the nurse. "I am James' Mother, and you will give me and this sweet young lady the information we need, or I will make a complaint." She said it in a firm, no nonsense tone, that reminded me of James. He had never mentioned his parents to me much before, so I was surprised to see his Mother here.

"I- I will get the information right away Ma'am." The nurse stuttered out, before fleeing away.

"Quickly!" His Mother yelled out, making the nurse scurry faster. Then she turned her eyes to me. "Now do you have any idea, why my dear son did not tell me about this?" She questioned, as she waved her hand around the waiting room.

"Um no idea." I sputtered. "I honestly have never heard him talk about you." I stated lamely. A fash of hurt crossed her eyes, before she hid it.

"Figures, I wish he would forgive me." She mumbled, collapsing in a chair. "When did he find out?" She asked, looking up at me, I was still standing there stunned.

I sat in a chair across from her, and began telling her about the last couple of weeks. "So it's all been very quick, which is good, it means he has a high chance of surviving this... I'm Bella, by the way." I said, reaching my hand out.

She grasped it tightly, shaking briefly, then letting go. "I'm Joanne, James' not so there Mother." She smiled ruefully. "I've tried, the past few years, but I guess it's too late for me... I wish I was a different person..." She trailed off, looking over at the nurses station.

The nurse we spoke to before was coming back, so we both stood. "James is out of surgery, and in the ICU for recovery. The doctor said he most likely wont be up for a few hours, but you can go see him for a few minutes." She said all this to Joanne, not looking my way.

Joanne shook her head and pointed to me. "No but Bella will, and I will hear no complaints about it. She needs to see him, and he needs to know she's there." The nurse stepped back as Joanne snapped at her.

Nodding sullenly the nurse led me away. I whispered a quick 'thank you' over my shoulder before I quit the room. I almost walked right back out of the room, when I seen the shape James was in... it scared me. He had a tube coming out of his chest, and wires hooked up to him. A breathing tube coming from his mouth. His skin was so pale, it seemed translucent. "He will be in her for up to 24 hours." She stated simply, while looking at his chart. "He did well in the surgery, there were no complications, and it says here the tumor was successfully removed." I nodded and thanked her, before shakily walking over and grabbing his hand.

"When will he wake up." I asked... I knew she had already told me... but I just couldn't remember.

"A few hours." She said again, her voice seemed a little... off. "Ma'am?" She questioned, I tried to focus on her words, but the world began to swim. Suddenly I was pulled back. "Sit down now." Snapped the nurse. "That's right, head between your knees." She instructed. It wasn't until I could feel the cold of the concrete seeping through my jeans, that I realized, I'd almost passed out. Moments later orange juice was being placed in my hand, and the nurse was forcing me to drink it. "There you go." She said, smiling gently at me. "I know it can be hard to see someone you love, looking so vulnerable... but you need to remember... from here on out, things will get easier." I nodded dumbly, rubbing my face with my free hand.

"Thank you for that." I mumbles, standing slowly once more. I felt woozy, but things were coming back into focus.

"Of course, lets get you back into the waiting room, where you can sit and rest for a few minutes." I let her lead me back, and sat heavily in the chair I was sitting in before.

"Are you okay." Asked a frightened looking Joanne.

"She's fine, she just had a hard time seeing Mr. Masters hooked up to the machines." The nurse stated, before patting my hand, and waking away.

"Was it really that bad?" Whispered Joanne. I looked up, my words gone. I nodded and turned away, feeling completely humiliated. I wished I could be stronger for him.

"I thought I could handle it." I finally said, once I got my voice back. "But it was so hard seeing him that was, so vulnerable... he's always been larger than life for me, even with the chemo, but this, him being unconscious and so still, it was scary." I hadn't meant to say all that, but it just spewed from my lips.

Joanne leaned over and grasped my hand. "It's hard, I know... James' father went through something very similar... though he was a stubborn man, and by the time he went in and got it checked, it was too late. He had prostate cancer and I had to watch him go through years of pain." She pulled back and looked away, her unfocused eyes told me she was reliving a moment. "He lived 3 years after they found it, and the years were not kind to him... James had just turned 16 when we James Senior lost his battle, he was a shell of who he once was, an angry, ignorant man... it wasn't that way before his pain, he was a loving husband and father... but that all changed after. In turn, it also changed me... I- I left him at 16, asking my sons friends family to take him in, and I disappeared for years."

She had tears falling from her eyes, and I wanted to reach out to her, but instead, I just listened. "I showed up when he was 25, expecting him to fall to his knees and forgive me... but instead he told me to go away, to never visit again... after awhile, and after a close friend told me to, I went to counseling, and realized the error of my ways. I took a different approach, apologizing repeatedly, he didn't bend much, but he did start talking to me a little, when I called. I know its not much, but it's better than nothing at all."

"Wow." I said, wide eyed. "I'm... I'm sorry about your husband." I finally said, I decided not to say anything about James... because I was on his side all the way, and this was not the time or place to tell her she was an idiot... and I had a feeling she already knew that.

James was moved out of the ICU and into a normal room the next evening, His breathing tube was removed, along with the wires, but the tube in his chest remained, the doctor had explained that it was a drainage tube. He was groggy and disoriented, because he was so drugged up. He was in and out of sleep for a full day after that.

By the 5th day his tube was gone, and he was moving around slowly. The nurses had him eating food, and he was able to get to and from the bathroom on his own. To say he was pissed when he found out his mother was here, was an understatement. But when I explained that she helped me, he softened a bit.

The Doctor took him for several chest x rays, and came back with a grin each time. Finally, on day 8 he came to the room looking as happy as I'd ever seen so far. "Ok James results are in, and you are cancer free my friend... and I think it's time for you to go home." James sighed in relief, I knew being in the hospital was hard for him. Just before he was about to say something, the Doctor continued. "You will take it easy at home, no heavy lifting, no cleaning, no running, no... er... strenuous activity." He gave a pointed look to me, which made me blush. "For at least 4 weeks, and I want to see you before then."

"Of course." Said James, looking embarrassed himself. "I'll be sure to take it easy." Within the hour, James was in a wheelchair and I was pushing him out the doors. He was agitated because I forced him into it, but dammit he had to take it easy.

"Stop sulking Babe." I said as I helped steady him, as he got into the passenger seat. "When your all healed you can carry me around... okay." James' frown cracked into a smile, and he nodded once...

James was looking nervously at me over the dinner table the next night, pushing his food around his plate. "Don't you like it?" I finally asked, It was chicken Alfredo, and I was loving it.

"No no its not that, it's great." He said a little too loudly, his smile a little phony. "It's just that... well... you look really good in my kitchen." He finally said. I could feel the surprise on my face. "As a matter of fact, you look really good in my house." He reached his hand over the table top, and grabbed my free hand. "I want you to move in." He blurted, cheeks reddening. "I mean, only if you want to." He stuttered out.

I felt numb, I didn't see this coming. "Uh... well... yeah." I finally got out, the smile that broke out over his face, mirrored my own I'm sure.

"Oh thank god." He breathed out. "I've been trying to figure out how to ask you all day." He murmured. Then he pulled on my hand, and I knew what he wanted, I stood up, and walked over, sitting gingerly on his lap. "I love you Bella Swan." He murmured into my hair. "And I want you forever."

My heart in my throat, I swallowed and said. "I love you you too James Masters, and I'm here for as long as you'll have me."

**Review Please! **

**One more chapter to go! **

**I know some of you might think I'm wrapping this up quickly, but I'm just not feelin it anymore! Lol and if I don't finish it now, I may not ever finish it, and that would suck! I hope everyone is having a wonderful day! :D :D :D **


	15. Epilogue!

**Stephenie Meier Owns It All!**

**So we've come to an end, I thank every single one of you for sticking with this story... it only took 3 years to write 15 Chapters! heh heh yeah between computers breaking, raising my Monster, and Moving twice, I kinda put my poor stories on the back burner. But I'm back, and I will be writing more, so I hope you all hang on to see what else I can come up with! :D **

Epilogue!

**James' POV**

I could feel Bella's skin against my own, her hair in my face, and her leg thrown over my hip... it was glorious. My heart beat wildly as my love for her felt like it would burst from my chest.

I had been cleared for any strenuous activity, for over a month, and we didn't waste it. Sex with my girlfriend was something I would never get tired of. She was starting to rub against me, moaning in her sleep, and I couldn't help but pull her leg closer, until her soaking center was against my erection. I grabbed her naked bottom, and pushed inside her. Bella gasped and her eyes shot open, then she was grabbing my head, pulling me in for a deep kiss. "Good morning." I murmured against her lips, thrusting slowly in and out.

"Mmm if you wake me up like this every morning, for the rest of my life... I'm... going to be... a happy... woman..." she was becoming breathless, as I sped up.

"Always Baby." I responded, biting down on her earlobe. With that she threw her head back, and tightened around me, her orgasm bringing on my own. "Damn Baby, you make me so fucking hot." I groaned into her neck. She was insatiable lately.

"Back at you." She breathed, rubbing her breasts against my chest.

We worked together well, at work and at home... she would cook, I would clean, things may not have been perfect for anyone else, but it was for us. We would argue, then we would make up... hell half the time we would argue, just so we could make up.

Bella came bursting into the house, a small bag in her hand. Her hair was piled on her head, and she looked shell shocked. "Hey Sexy whats wrong?" I asked, walking up to her... but she walked right past me, shaking her head. I followed her up the stairs, but she slammed the bathroom door in my face, before I could say anything else. "Hey whats wrong." I yelled through the door. I was answered with the water being turned on. I stood there, waiting for something. I heard the toilet flush, and the water get turned of... then more silence. "Bella." I hollered. "What the hells going on."

Just then she opened the door, and her face was red, her eyes glassy, and in her hands between us was a small white plastic stick. I looked at it in confusion for some time. Not quite grasping what was happening. The end of the stick had digital writing on it 'Pregnant 3+' "I didn't think it was possible." She breathed. "I stopped taking my birth control... I'm so so sorry James, I didn't think."

I could feel myself grinning, not understanding why she was upset. "My soldiers still work." Was the first thing to come out of my mouth. I hadn't meant to say it... but damn. Bella looked up at me in shock.

"Is that all you have to say." She screeched, then cringed.

I pulled her to me, wrapping my arms around her. "Oh Baby, this is a good thing, this is something I thought was never going to happen for us." I murmured in her hair, the thought of having to use my frozen sperm to make a baby... well it was less than desirable. "Unless... I mean... unless your not ready?" I asked uneasily. I didn't even think to ask how she was feeling.

She looked up and started to sob and laugh at the same time. "Of course I am... I just didn't know if you would be." We held each other close after that, soaking in each others joy.

It was the best surprise I could have ever asked for.

* * *

><p>I can see it, she may be fully covered, but underneath those clothes... she is completely one hundred percent... naked...<p>

My beautiful bride to be, was walking towards me, swathed in the most gorgeous wedding dress I'd ever seen. But all I could think about, was getting her naked. Which was probably a bad thing to think about in church.

I eyed my Mother in the first row, with a serene smile on her face, and my son in her lap. I'd broken down and let her into my life after the cancer scare, because life was just too short. At that moment Jacob let out a cry, and Bella faltered in her steps, most likely wanting to run to our son... but my Mother quickly quieted him down.

The ceremony was long, and fucking boring. I kept chanting I do, I do, I do, over and over in my head... so when it finally came to my turn to actually say it, I sounded insanely eager. I could hear people laugh at my enthusiasm. Bella smiled with tears in her eyes.

As I pulled her to me, after signing our papers, I walked down the isle with my beautiful bride, and the doors opened almost blinding me... I had a moment of true terror wash through me... _is this real, or am I dead, did the cancer take me_...

And then my eyes adjusted to the light, the green grass and pathway in front of us, and I had to chuckle at myself... of course it was real, I could never imagine anything this perfect...

**THE END! I hope you all enjoyed! Please Review! Let me know what you think! **


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